Union Street McDonald’s to close at 11pm

No more late night McNuggets


The Union Street McDonald’s will no longer serve food after 11pm due to concerns raised by the police.

The decision has been made in the wake of a number of particularly rowdy society nights. One officer has said: “Personally I’m relieved. After a long day of police work, I’m filled with dread by freshers soaked in recycled VK.”

The inevitable loss of such a gem in the Aberdeen nightlife crown will be felt by all those stumbling to the taxi rank without soggy sustenance. Nights out will never be the same.