So you’re going to Institute for the first time

You’re half way through the uni year and you haven’t been to Institute yet? Where have you been spending your Wednesday and Friday nights?

Sounds like you need a how-to guide on surviving a night at Institute.

Remember there’s an upstairs and downstairs

And they’re so very different.

Downstairs is where you find those people who love the proper club tunes.It’s also easier to pull on the bottom floor because you physically can’t dance and sing along to the weird remixes they play, unlike upstairs.

Upstairs is the dream destination if you love everything noughties pop and RnB. The DJ up here is likely to play Beyonce, Eminem and maybe Flower of Scotland at the end of the night if you’re good.

The stairs

Careful walking down them if you’re absolutely off your tits drunk.

The queue is infamous

If it’s Wednesday or Saturday make sure you’re there before half eleven. If not prepare to have all your mojo sapped by the freezing 40 minute wait.

Don’t try to leave

When you pay for entry you get given a receipt that you then have to put into a box reminiscent of a bowl full of car keys at a swingers party.

If you want to leave then you take a receipt out as a token to get back in. Except you need to go all the way to the back of that 40 minute queue. You certainly don’t want to walk out for a fag on your first night out in freshers week to realise that you’re not getting back in.

Skite Wednesdays will be your best and worst bits

Institute’s most infamous club nights are the notorious Skite night on a Wednesday, and Vanity on a Friday. Skite will be both the best and worst night out of your life.

It’ll be the best night of your life because you’ll get to experience something amazing, that not everyone has the honour to. Skite nights are something special, you get to see the sports societies in their natural habitat, and half of the student population eating each other’s faces.

It is Institute’s pride and joy, we love Skite and you will too.

The bouncers

Don’t mess. Don’t be a rugby lad. Don’t be a member of a sports club. Don’t be a member of a society. Don’t be dressed as a pirate-cowboy crossover with assless chaps (You’d be surprised by how many of my mates have been screwed by that one). Don’t be drunk. Don’t breathe. Remember these rules and you’ll be fine.

Rugby boys are a force to be reckoned with

Skite Wednesdays are always full of sports societies, from Lacrosse to Cricket and this brings us on to the infamous AURFC – yes the rugby boys!

You can spot them a mile off with their sports tie on and VK in hand.

Don’t get us wrong they’re a nice bunch of guys but when they’re all together in a VK cloud with their eyes on the next un-assuming girl – they are a force to be reckoned with.

We’re just warning you about them.

Bring hand sanitiser

Ironic that this is the next thing we want to talk about after rugby boys.

But seriously, do bring hand sanitiser with you and you will be grateful and so will the people in the bathroom with you.

So with this guide and the help of your Institute-experienced pals, hopefully you will survive your first night in one of Aberdeen’s most popular clubs.