Where to hide in Aberdeen during a zombie apocalypse

This far isolated we have to be prepared for anything


After being defeated by the recent floods, snow and almighty Storm Gertrude, it’s time for Aberdeen to get a grip and prepare itself for anything.

Does the city council have a plan of action in the case of a zombie apocalypse? I don’t think so. This far North and coastal, we couldn’t exactly call on other cities for aid, as we would all have been devoured by the time they got there.

Not to worry though, once again, the students have got this one covered.

Underground 

Hiding out from a zombie here would be most effective on a Tuesday night at Carwash, because let’s be honest, once you lose someone in there you’re never finding them again. The smell of perfume masked BO might even keep them from checking the venue in the first place. They also wouldn’t stand a chance running on the sticky floor.

It take immense talent to be able to manoeuvre through this

It take immense talent to be able to manoeuvre through this

The Taylor Library

If 50% of students who actually attend Aberdeen Uni don’t know that this place exists, how would a zombie?

Get yourself wedged between the shelves and no one will suspect a thing. One problem with this hiding place is that it might be a tad difficult to stay awake and alert amidst the extensive law volumes you will be surrounded by.

It helps if you're tiny too

It helps if you’re tiny too

Codonas 

Purely because an empty amusement park is a perfectly cliched setting for a zombie movie. To be fair the title Amusement Park is pushing it, but the ferris-wheel carriages or log flumes could still act as excellent hiding places.

Straight out of 'Zombieland'

Straight out of Zombieland

King’s College 

Now this one would seriously send a zombie running, even if a big old building might be a bit creepy to hide in during an apocalypse. Can anyone actually find a class in there?

“Hey sorry can you help me out, I’m looking for room KCG8910ABC2DH7VGDT56FHK?”

Tip: A yellow jacket probably wouldn't be the best camouflage during an apocalypse

Tip: A yellow jacket probably wouldn’t be the best camouflage during an apocalypse

A male first year’s room in halls

Is anyone going to go in there by choice? Probably not.

Even if a zombie did, and managed to force the door open, the obstacle course of sweaty gym clothes, important books and boxers would prove too much of a challenge for their weak limbs.

Desk are made for hiding under, aren't they?

Desk are made for hiding under, aren’t they?

Garage

No one goes there.

It's even 'caution' colours

It’s even ‘caution’ colours

To be honest though, all that said, any zombie who manages to withstand the winds up here actually deserves a good meal.