Aberdeen ranked 25th best uni in the UK

But does anyone really care?

Aberdeen care rankings students

U.S News has revealed we are ranked 25th in the UK and 240th in the world, just behind Lancaster and in front of Leicester.

750 global universities were judged against each other primarily on their Global Research Reputation, their Regional Research Reputation and their Publications.

We don’t care about your stats

Remember when you were choosing what uni to go to? So many people spent hours looking at the endless stats which universities had been boiled down to and in the end discover they’re basically meaningless.

The US News evaluated universities based on their “research performance and its ratings by members of the academic community around the world and within Europe.”

Apparently Ph.D.s awarded per academic staff member are supposed to give you an idea of whether you want to go to Aberdeen or not. Does anyone care how Aberdeen is ranked for its conferences? The things that really matter simply cannot be quantified. Student Satisfaction is the most ridiculous. At the end of a lecture did the professor light up a fag and awkwardly ask “How was that for you?”

The main selling points of the Scottish universities are obvious. Dundee is best for dealing with STDs, Glasgow for night life, Edinburgh for castles (honourable mention for Stirling) and Aberdeen is the best.

What about a statistic for how likely you are to lose your virginity in freshers week? Maybe you want to know the percentage of students who really love deep house. Do the halls have smoke or heat alarms? These are the questions people should be asking.