We ventured to Coventry to see what it’s actually like to go for food at Binley Mega Chippy

The vibes were mega, the food was not

2 years ago

Yesterday, I made the holiest of pilgrimages a human being can undertake. I went for food at Binley Mega Chippy, and this is my comprehensive review of what it’s actually like to pay the TikTok national institution a visit in real life.

I do not live near Binley Mega Chippy, and my visit occurred down to a lovely circumstantial turn of events. For those uninitiated, Binley Mega Chippy is in, well, Binley. Binley Mega Chippy has gone Binley Mega Viral on TikTok for reasons that can’t be explained beyond the internet’s love for randomness and stupid stuff that’s vewy Bri’ish innit. The jingle, the over saturation, all the hallmarks of a stupid viral TikTok sensation. Binley, the home of Binley Mega Chippy, is in Coventry. Do you know who was in Coventry from Friday to Monday last week? THIS GUY.

I was in Coventry for Radio One’s Big Weekend – and Ellie, my Coventrian pal who I was staying with for the festival, told me that Binley Mega Chippy was a mere five minute drive from her family home. It was a done deal – we were going. A pilgrimage to Binley Mega Chippy for a picture, a TikTok and a sample of their MEGA wares.

Binley Mega Arrival and Binley Mega First Impressions

We rolled up to Binley Mega Chippy to find it was still in the process of opening – despite the fact we thought it opened at 11 and it was now nearing 12. 12 was now the newly accepted opening time. We got out of the car to find a group of about 10 lads were all jumping about by a minivan and blasting a drum and bass remix of the TikTok created Binley Mega Chippy jingle. The staff posed for slightly bemused pictures. So far, this is exactly how I thought my arrival would be.

My friend briefly thought that it was Bad Boy Chiller Crew who’d rocked up to the BMC – but it was just a bunch of university lads who’d popped in to the chippy after a hockey game. Every now and then, a few of the lads would get on their knees and pray to Binley Mega Chippy. It felt oddly… correct.

There was time to kill before Binley Mega Chippy opened, so we all just mingled about in nervous anticipation. Upon arrival, my first impressions were: I do not want anything from this place to go down my gullet. The chips on a picture on the wall outside were upside down, which was mildly discomforting to say the least.

That saveloy is sus

A Binley Mega Food Review of Binley Mega Chippy

The shutters were up at 12, and the staff didn’t know what had hit them. The cars were rolling in, and it was a bizarre crowd of rowdy TikTokkers ready to give their Binley Mega Chippy review and acting like they were in some chip shop edition of the cult from Midsommar and Binley residents who had no clue who all these youths were in their local fishery.

The menu was massive. Mega, if you will. The first thing you’re told is that if you want onion rings and samosas, tell the Binley Boys right away so they can put them on for you. This tickled me.

YES BOSS!

Everyone was getting food, and on observation the fish and chips actually looked rather peng. I couldn’t come all this way and not try SOMETHING, so I got a small fish and chips to see if I could review Binley Mega Chippy as mega by name and mega by nature. I wanted to get the Morbius meal, of course, but was told that was merely fiction.

This cost me £7.10, if anyone’s arsed

Visually, I was wowing. The chips looked good, not too greasy, and there was nothing small about this portion size or the cod that was flopped on the top. I stayed away from the mushy peas, because they were grey. We asked for knives to cut up the fish and the man brought out a big metal one – they don’t have any plastic knives. I tore this fish up with my bare hands.

TikTokker Ollie Ball then rolled up to see what all the fuss was about, which was quite a nice surprise because I’d just spent the weekend in and out of his company in the press section of Big Weekend and so he came over and tried a chip. His review was pending.

It’s Ollie Ball here! Naturally

My review, however, is in. Binley Mega Chippy should be called Binley Mid Chippy. The only thing mega about my trip was the vibes, the cultural phenomenon and the sense of weird, online joy of us all there being absolute weirdos. The food was decent to good. But, not to put too fine a point on it, I spent the rest of the day barely off the toilet. Make of that what you will.

But should you make the journey and go yourselves? Overall – I will conclude my review of Binley Mega Chippy by saying that you absolutely should. Be part of the phenomenon. Sing the theme tune. Maybe meet a TikTokker or two! Before the world forgets about this bizarre internet fad in a week or so.