11 burning questions I need answering after watching Clickbait so I can sleep at night

All you need to do is watch the trailer for Clickbait on Netflix and you know it’s going to be a wild ride. Then you watch the first episode and see a bloodied Nick Brewer being videoed holding up a sign saying he abuses women and will die when the video hits five million views, so you’re simply forced to watch the show up to the ending to see what happens. And what does end up happening during the whirlwind that is Clickbait will no doubt leave you with a few burning questions.

There are so many wild twists and turns and revelations you’ll end up with whiplash. The characters are all a little bit annoying and the ending. Well. The ending. What is there to say really? I’m speechless. I honestly haven’t felt this way since I watched Behind Her Eyes and couldn’t think about anything else for weeks. Here are all the burning questions that I quite frankly need answering after watching Clickbait, otherwise I will never rest soundly ever again.

1. Ok, first things first, is Pia’s hair real?

Right let’s kick off the burning questions with something that has bothered me since the first minute of Clickbait on Netflix. You simply cannot skip over this as a minor detail. Pia’s hair never moves, never changes and is so structured I’m sure it must be a wig. But then if it is, why? It’s stressing me out, okay?

2. WHY DID EVERYONE IN NICK’S FAMILY WATCH THE VIDEO SO MANY TIMES?!

Can’t say I’ve ever found myself in this situation so can’t actually relate, but I’m pretty sure that if a video of one of my family members said that if it kept getting views they’d die, I’d stop watching it?! Just a guess.

Five million views, four million of which were Pia.

3. Hold on, did Nick Brewer actually ever cheat then?

So after all this, was Nick completely innocent? I think we’re meant to realise that, but Dawn did hack a dating site he was on to start off the chain of events, so he was signed up to one. His profile said he was looking for “friendship and fun” and we have no evidence he was actively meeting up with anyone he had met online. Dawn saw a notification of a message on Nick’s phone, that’s it. I don’t know what to believe.

4. How did none of these women clock that they were actually talking to a woman in her 60s?

Dawn still says “ditto” in her messages. Come on. Not a single one of these young, savvy women had any idea they were talking to Dawn? I’m pretty sure her sexting wouldn’t have been up to much.

5. Are Pia and the detective going to get together now or?

I know this is literally the least important part of this entire show, and you can call me shallow, but I need know these sorts of things. Pia and Roshan clearly both fancied each other and the sexual chemistry was through the roof – the only thing getting in the way was the conflict of interest with Roshan and the case. So now that’s over… can they date or?

6. Why will Daryl haunt my dreams forever?

I’m sorry but this man is absolutely petrifying. Unnecessarily so.

7. Did anyone else find Pia insanely annoying for no apparent reason?

From the moment I laid eyes on her she was irritating. No particular reason, she just was. Great character though, just completely insufferable at times.

8. Why didn’t Nick just go straight to the police himself? Or a hospital for that matter?

When Nick was finally set free from the back of that creepy van and the clutches of Simon and Daryl, that was his second chance at life. It had been pretty much certified that they were going to kill him, after the video did end up getting five million views. He made the quite miraculous realisation that it must have been Dawn behind the whole thing (incredibly quick thinking, but that’s besides the point), so he went straight to her house demanding she went to the police. He’d been half beaten to death, was a hospital not a more sensible option? How on earth did he even know where he was and how to get to Dawn’s house? Couldn’t he have just cut out the middle man, and more importantly saved his own life, by just going to the police himself?

9. Is someone going to arrest Ben Park, please?

This man has broken into two people’s houses now. TWO.

10. AM I MISSING SOMETHING OR ARE WE MEANT TO ACTUALLY BELIEVE DAWN IS THE PHOTOSHOP WIZ?

At the end the big reveal is that the person who kickstarted it all was Dawn. Lovely, cute, wholesome 60-something Dawn from Nick’s work. But also, wasn’t the whole reason the catfishing was able to go unnoticed because the pictures had been so well photoshopped? Nick had to zoom right in on the pictures and really persuade Simon they had been edited for him to not kill him.

So you mean to tell me that little Dawn was the photoshop master this whole time? The same Dawn who was doing most  of this from a desktop computer at home? And who was fascinated by how dating apps work? SHE knows how to use photoshop? Pull the other one. This is possibly the most burning of all the questions I have for whoever wrote Clickbait. Explain!!!

11. Why hasn’t Pia taken off her leather jacket even once?

WHY DOES PIA DRESS LIKE SHE IS THE NEWEST MEMBER OF PARAMORE? Take off your leather jacket, I beg. She even wears it to Nick’s funeral?!

I am done with questioning Pia now, I promise.

Clickbait is available on Netflix now. For all the latest Netflix news, drops and memes like The Holy Church of Netflix on Facebook. 

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