These are the worst types of housemates, according to students

Brb just having the sudden realisation that I am the worst housemate

I always thought I was the best housemate. Everyone does. No matter how messy or tidy you are, no matter how much you nag or how little you chip in for the purchases of household items, a certain level of cocky denial is always held. You tell yourself as you fall asleep nightly, “I am definitely not the worst housemate”. Well, I have a rude awakening for you: You actually are.

This is coming from someone who just asked a bunch of people what makes up the worst housemate, and realising that I do literally every single one of these things. I am the person that moans about cleaning but then doesn’t actually clean that much. I am the one that never takes the bins out. I am the one that waits until 8pm the next day to clean up after a party in the hope that someone else might cave and do it. I am the one who stays still for 5 minutes after the doorbell rings so that it sounds like I’m asleep or not in and I don’t have to answer it. And chances are, so are you.

Maybe you haven’t done all of these things (I am a particularly large species of rat, I’ll admit it), but you’re definitely guilty of a few, and that meets the criteria of making YOU the worst housemate. So for learning purposes for all us baddies, or for catharsis purposes for the actual good housemates reading this – these are the worst types of housemates, according to the people that live with them.

The one that always forgets their keys

“The worst type of housemate is the one who rings the doorbell after every night out when you’re all asleep. How can you forget your keys THAT many times?” – Lizzy

The one that acts like they’re tidy, but they’re not

“I hate the fake clean housemate. They say they always clean up but the reality is they trash the flat and leave you to clean it. They’re just bluffing.” – Em

The housemate that leaves food out

“The ones who never clean up after themselves are the worst – had a housemate leave their egg sandwich to rot over the weekend.” – Katelyn

“My housemate left milk and cream cheese in the fridge when they went home for weeks. So gross.” – Lizzy

“We had a rat problem in my house and – KNOWING THIS – my housemate would leave food out in the living room and on the kitchen side for days. When I heard squeaking in the distance as I fell asleep I cursed the day he was born.” – Phoebe

The one that uses the same kitchen stuff as the vegetarians

“I HATE the people that use the veggie pans for meat and then don’t even clean them up!” – Lily

The moaner

“One of the worst housemates is the self dictated ‘flat mum’ who constantly talks about how they do EVERYTHING and clean ALL THE TIME and it gets very annoying. Yes, we know you think you’re amazing and we were grateful until you told us how great you were a thousand times. It’s getting old now.” – Phoebe

The one that voms after nights out

“The one who uses the communal toilet to chunder in even though they’ve got an ensuite. Sick of it. Pardon the pun.” – Tom

“What actually drives me mad is those housemates who don’t vomit in the toilet? Like kitchen sink, bath, shower – everything but the toilet and everything that doesn’t have a flush function. WHY?” – Phoebe

The Deliveroo and Uber Eats litterbug

“The one who always orders takeaway and then leaves their Maccies wrappers all over the flat. Grim.” – Em

The housemate who found the house then thinks you’re indebted to them forever

“The one who found the house and then thinks they have a carte blanche to get out of ever helping again. They suck.” – Lily

The one in a couple

“Ugh, the one who moves their boyfriend in and he becomes a flatmate as well. I didn’t sign up for that.” – Em

The TV hog

“The flatmate who dictates what you watch all the time is so annoying – like why do you think your taste is above everyone else’s?”

Posho in denial housemate

“The one who came from Tunbridge Wells but gradually morphs into an edgy DJ Depop king/queen as the term progresses. Then goes home and puts their jodhpurs and gilet back on for mummy and daddy.” – Lizzy

Posho not-in-denial housemate

“The housemate who (when signing for a new house) brags about finances and offers to pay six months upfront despite having a guarantor.” – Georgia

“The posh one, definitely. My flatmate made it known 24/7 his dad is a multi-millionaire and they have seven houses up and down the country. When we make jokes about him being a millionaire he corrects us like ‘no, multi-millionaire’.” – Katelyn

“Lowkey though the flatmate who brags about how rich they are but then somehow never pays for anything is SO annoying.” – Em

The utter cheapskates

“I’ve got a flatmate who purchased a TV stand for £4 and asked all of us to transfer him 50p. Like, are you kidding?” – Georgia

The ones who bring DJ decks to pres

“Any housemate that has decks or brings a mate to pres who brings their decks – saying like ‘Oh yeah I can mix a little bit’, fucks sake. A little bit is not enough to warrant you bringing them to pres when nobody asked!” – Georgia

The flatmate that lets people smoke inside

“The flatmate who lets people smoke indoors and then you come home and the whole flat smells like an ashtray.” – Em

The one who’s mates leave a load of shit in your house

“The flatmate that hosts a pres and then a load of stuff appears in your kitchen from other people. Then they say their mates are coming to pick up their 1/4 bottle of gin but I’ve already claimed it as my own. Look, you leave your teddy coat at my pres and it becomes my teddy coat, thems the rules.” – Phoebe

The housemate who always needs to know when people are coming over

“I had housemates who would have to know if I had friends coming over for pres even if they (the housemates) weren’t themselves attending pres? Like when we had a social at ours we had to let the house know waaaay in advance that it was happening. Ridic.” – Bec

The flatmates who are shit at drinking games

“I hate those flatmates that are proper shit at drinking games and can’t come up with anything. Like wanna play Never Have I Ever? Nah. Paranoia? Nah. Ring of fire? Nah. I’m aware they’re shit but GIVE ME SUGGESTIONS THEN.” – Phoebe

Related stories recommended by this writer:

We asked bartenders the worst things you can do while ordering at the bar

‘He sat in my kitchen ranting until 2am’: Girls share their worst first date stories

These are the worst people at restaurants, according to waiters