19 mistakes all guys are guilty of doing when fingering a girl
Why you ignoring my clit tho?
The TabDo you know what’s not okay? That some people – men – still don’t know how to finger a woman properly.
PSA people – we’re not 15 years old anymore in the bathroom of a house party where everyone’s exclusively drinking knock-off blue WKD and two litre bottles of Strongbow. Bad fingering was understandable back then, but we should be older and wiser now, thanks to porn, how to finger a girl guidance articles and practice.
But for those of you still struggling to make a girl come because you don’t know how to finger a girl properly – don’t worry, you’re probably making one or many of the following mistakes:
1. IGNORING THE CLIT
For some girls, the only way they can come is via clitoral stimulation. Ignoring the clit is essentially a crime worthy of 20 years imprisonment, and you should be locked up for committing such an offence.
2. HAVING LONG, SHARP FINGER NAILS
She’s definitely not going to come if you’re scratching her insides with your nasty, long finger nails. Please remember to cut them before any sexual activity please and thank you.
3. FINGERING REALLY, REALLY FAST LIKE AN AUTOMATIC DRILL
Please stop.
4. FORGETTING TO FINGER AT ALL AND GOING STRAIGHT INTO SEX OR ORAL
Urrr excuse me sir, did you forget to put your finger in me?
5. TRYING TO PUT YOUR WHOLE FIST IN
A lesson: this happens in porn, and not in real life, and if you genuinely thought you could just stroll on in here and put your whole fist in and then what, I guess sunflower it (??) you were wrong. Go back to your porn.
6. NOT LUBING UP IF SHE’S NOT WET ENOUGH
There are loads of reasons why she might not be wet yet. Maybe she’s nervous, or just not in the mood mood right now. Maybe you rushed the kissing, there hasn’t been enough touching, or maybe she just needs some assistance getting the party going.
Use lube!!! If she’s still not wet enough do not start forcing your fingers in to that desert. It’s uncomfortable, and bound to make her shut her legs and never let you enter ever again. Lube makes everything more fun, plus it’ll feel great on her clit.
7. FINGERING FOR TOO LONG
If it’s going on for any more than 10 minutes you need to stop. Get down there with your tongue, or see if she’s ready for sex, or maybe just call it a night.
8. GOING ON AN EXPEDITION TO FIND THE CLIT, AND ENDING UP IN THE WRONG PLACE
That is my inner thigh.
9. A LACK OF UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENT PARTS TO THE VAGINA
Google it!
10. DESPERATELY TRYING TO FIND THE G-SPOT
It’s just awkward and tbh there’s other things you could be getting on with.
11. PUSHING YOUR FINGERS IN SO FAR AS IF YOU’RE TRYING TO REACH HER STOMACH
Don’t know what you’re looking for mate other than my large intestine?
12. LACK OF RHYTHM
Don’t treat your girl’s vagina like some kind of buzzer game of whoever can press the buzzer the most amount of times in a minute wins. There needs to be some pace, thought and rhythm to fingering. And it doesn’t all need to be 100mph.
Respond to her – does she like it when you finger her really slowly, putting your fingers in some way then back out then all the way in? Mix it up a bit – keep it spicy.
13. MULTI-TASKING WHEN FINGERING, LIKE KISSING OR BOOB TOUCHING
Real pros will have multi-tasking down. You want to be fingering whilst kissing, or touching her boobs, or sucking or twisting her nipples. You want to make every single part of her body alongside her clit and vagina be singing “hallelujah! hallelujah! hallelujah!”
14. GETTING THE RIGHT MOTION
So apparently to hit the G-spot you need to do a ‘come hither’ motion with your finger. The G-spot area feels ridged, and is on the front wall of the vagina.
But finding the G-spot can be difficult, plus remember not all girls come from penetration. It’s best to mix up your motions, but don’t do so many it feels like she’s some kind of musical instrument.
15. NOT TAKING DIRECTION WHEN SHE’S NOT ENJOYING IT
If she’s not making noises, telling you to go faster, or that what you’re doing is good, she’s probably not enjoying it. If she does give you a helping hand, don’t get offended and feel your ego has been bruised – fingering a girl is collaborative.
16. NOT APPLYING ENOUGH PRESSURE TO THE CLIT, OR APPLYING WAY TOO MUCH
The clitoris has 8,000 nerve endings. It’s extremely sensitive and should be handled with care. But if you’re handling it with too much care, she’s not going to feel it. Like wise if you push down on it too forcefully, it’s either going to hurt or be uncomfortable. If you can’t get the right pressure, let her help you out.
17. FORGETTING TO PLAY WITH THE CLIT WHEN FINGERING A GIRL
Just play with EVERYTHING.
18. WHEN THERE’S NOT ENOUGH BUILD UP PRE-FINGERING AND PRE-CLIT TOUCHING
Fingering a girl requires a warm up act before anything can happen. Unless she’s getting aroused and tense, she’s not going to be ready for you to stick two fingers in or start manically rubbing her clit like a turntable.
Spend some time kissing, touch her boobs, work your way down there. Touch her neck, brush the outside of her pants, slowly run your hand up her thigh. Never just pounce in her vagina like you’re grabbing the last Malteaser from the Celebrations box.
19. SOME GIRLS ONLY WANT CLIT ACTION, SO DON’T KEEP GOING WITH YOUR FINGERS
Listen to what she likes – if she’s not reacting to fingers stick to the clit.
Related stories recommended by this writer:
• How to finger a girl properly, by disappointed girls
• How to get nudes, as explained by girls