Your votes are in: These are the three fittest uni boys in the UK, no debate
THOUSANDS of you voted
Fit boys. They keep our planet in orbit, they make Instagram worth using, and if they didn't say things like "have you ever had your belly button tickled from the inside" they'd probably be the best things ever.
Over the last three months, The Tab has scoured the country for fittest freshers, most eligible bachelors, and hottest singles. We then took 25 of the tastiest snacks from as far north as Aberdeen and as far south as Exeter, and put them all in one big thirst trap of an article – all to find out who is the fittest uni boy in the UK.
The competition was fierce, and 6,898 of you voted. Now we can reveal the three fittest uni boys in the country. Pour one out for the 22 who didn't make it.
Third place: Thomas O'Hare, Newcastle, first year
Thomas O'Yungboi is in fact a model. He breezed through The Newcastle Tab's famously tough fittest fresher competition, but couldn't quite overcome the might of a mobilised Fab n Fresh comment section, as you'll see below.
To repeat, Thomas is a model, and his ideal date would be to have a few bevs in Mimos and then "see where the night takes us."
If you're into Irish boys, you're in luck, because Thomas has an O in his name. If you're into models, don't worry, because Thomas. Is. A. Model.
Asked how it felt being the third fittest uni boy in the country, he said: "It feels better than fourth." He is WITTY, ladies.
He told The Tab he'd had "loads" of DMs since The Newcastle Tab essentially made him a local celebrity. One of them said: "If you were a transformer, you'd be Optimus Fine."
He told The Tab he's single. Wow.
Second place: Sam Walon, Birmingham, fifth year
Sam is a fit medic and really there are few positions in the uni ecosystem more coveted than that. He somehow didn't win The Birmingham Tab's hottest single competition, but that might be because The Birmingham Tab screwed him over him by not including the topless picture of him surfing.
Sam said he's have Batman play him in a movie about his life, which doesn't make sense because Batman is a FICTIONAL CHARACTER, SAM. His celebrity crush is Velma from Scooby Doo (cartoon or real), so it's really reassuring that this man will one day be in charge of making sure you don't die in a hospital.
Asked how it felt to miss out on the top spot, Sam told The Tab: "I'm alright, but nan is devastated as she’s spent my whole life thinking I'm the MOST handsome."
Shame on you for not voting for him. Think of his nan.
WINNER: Guy F P Watts, Lancaster, second year
Okay maybe we were a little mean about Guy when we suggested The Lancaster Tab's hottest single competition was "slim pickings." Maybe we triggered the entirety of Lancaster Uni's population, or maybe, as Guy told The Tab, his Instagram following is stronger than he thought.
Guy languished at the bottom of the pile for a week after we published our initial vote, but over the last few weeks he surged into the lead with a staggering 1,536 votes – more than Sam and Thomas put together and roughly 22 per cent of the entire vote.
Guy described himself to The Lancaster Tab as "the biggest Tory on campus", which in Lancaster is probably more impressive than this title.
When The Tab told Guy he had stormed ahead of the other boys he was shocked, saying: "The last time I checked I was stone dead last on about 20, I hadn’t expected it to get above that!"
Guy denied putting much effort into encouraging others to vote for him. Asked to explain how he had managed such an upset, he said: Obviously the Tory charm paid off."
What did he have to say to those who had voted for him? Guy told The Tab: "A big thank you, hopefully they’ll see me on the front of the new £50 note soon enough, despite Brexit."
And to the vanquished 24 boys who Guy left in the dust, he said: "Sorry chaps, better luck next time."