Your seemingly normal choice of iconic British lunch reveals who you really are as a person
Getting a Boots meal deal is borderline psychopathic
Life is full of difficult choices, and what to have for lunch each day is one of the hardest to make.
Will you have another bog-standard Tesco meal deal or will you treat yourself and splash out on a Pret?
We spend the majority of our lives pretending to be normal, straight out of the box human beings, but when faced with the judgement call of what to have for a lunch, everyone shows their true colours.
Whether it's what you get on a reg, or what you have as a treat every once in a while, your choice opens a window to your soul. Don't believe us? Find your favourite iconic British lunch and see what it says about who you really are as a person.
Pret a Manger
Ah, the sweet taste of gentrification. You're either from London or have moved their recently. You're already a trainee accountant or plan to sack off all of your hopes and dreams in order to become one.
You're a simple soul, as long as you have a nice lunch not much else can go wrong in your day. Dropping £4 on breakfast and £7 on lunch is no biggie if it distracts you from the reality of mortality and the fact you'll spend the majority of your time on this planet putting numbers into spreadsheets.
You found yourself on your gap yah and will drone on to anyone who will listen about how great being a vegan is. A self-described free spirit who doesn't really believe in the concept of money. But luckily daddy pays your rent, leaving you enough spare change jangling about in the pockets of your harem pants to scrape together enough cash for an Avo and Beans Toasted Tortilla.
A classic panic-buy lunch. You find it hard to make decisions and even harder to push the boat out. Ham sandwich, ready salted crisps, a bottle of Sprite, and a Yorkie bar. Every single day of your dreary existence.
Are you genuinely allergic to excitement? You're not a risk taker and you'll do anything for a quiet life. Your idea of a good night is watching the new episode of Made In Chelsea or playing a couple of games of Fifa before going to bed at 10:30pm on the dot, making sure you get a full eight hours.
Oh, la di da. You're the queen and we're the sorry people. Either an out and out Tory or a secret one. You're happy to settle for a sandwich for lunch, but you're not a pauper who is looking to benefit from some sort of meal deal. A salt beef pretzel sub, vegetable crisps, and a super green cleansing smoothie. Who the hell do you think you are?
You want people to understand your opulence, to feel the full force of your ability to chuck £6 at a sandwich, crisps and a drink. I hope you get mayo on your red chinos.
You're stuck in no mans land, not quite the awful people who get their lunch from Waitrose, but you've also got more about you than the dull normies who unimaginatively lumber into Tesco every day. You're alright I guess.
You work in PR or marketing, went to a nice school, got a good degree from Nottingham, and now you go to Itsu for lunch every day. The worst thing? You don't even like sushi. It just looks really good on your Instagram story, and you can geo-tag it so people definitely know you went to Itsu for lunch. AGAIN.
You’re a creep, buying lunch from a pharmacy is rogue. Queueing up with a sandwich and drink while the person in front of you is buying eyedrops or foot cream. There’s a sinister edge to your personality, something’s not quite right.
You are just an all-round sound person. Like the humble sausage roll, you're impossible to dislike. The type of person that's somehow friends with everyone, a lovable rogue, effortlessly better than everyone else, even on their worst days.
Personal hygiene is not an overwhelming concern of yours. You turn your underwear inside out to get an extra days use out of them.
Your name is Kevin, you live in your parent's attic, spend most of your time playing World of Warcraft and always get a footlong Meatball Marinara.
— Booths (@BoothsCountry) September 20, 2017
The Waitrose of the North. You’re posh as fuck but at uni your northern accent tricked all of your southern mates into thinking you’re down to Earth. You play up to this massively, complaining about how posh everyone else is, blissfully unaware you're a daddy's girl who likes the finer things in life.
Uni Library Café
You're always around but no-one is really sure why. You don't contribute much. You really care about your studies and talking about your degree is your favourite conversation topic. It's a shame a total of zero people give a fuck about what you have to say.
A stale egg and cress sandwich, a greasy pepperoni panini, a tuna and sweetcorn baguette. Trying to get a first is not worth these woeful lunch options.
The food in the library café is sweaty, bland and usually beige-coloured, exactly like you.
Wetherspoons is great, we don't need to get into that discussion now. But for lunch? Alright you legend. You're obviously a bit of a loose cannon but in quite a straightfoward way. Snapchatting yourself having a pint with lunch to your mates, reasserting your confidence in your own masculinity despite all those soppy texts you send to your girlfriend.
If a box of McNuggets is your idea of lunch and you are not 10-years-old, you should probably be on some sort of register. Sorry, someone had to say it.
You still live at home with your parents because you don't know how to work the washing machine. Your noncey packed lunch includes: a Dairylea sandwich with the crusts cut off, a cheese string, a wagon wheel, and a petit filous. Making your own packed lunch was a big step for you, but it won't hide the fact you're still very much a child trapped in a grown up's body.
West Cornwall Pasty Company
Is your name Dave and are you a lorry driver? Are you an accountant called Gavin getting a train to Swindon for a very important meeting? No? Get yourself a proper lunch then.
YAAAAS I'll pay £5 for a panini that has too much bread and not enough filling. You're basic and a bit of a sheep. You keep your iPhone 7 in pristine condition and have a flawless Instagram.