All the sad and desperate ways the Tories are trying to win back your vote
Half-arsed policies and tragic Instagrams? Of course you can have my vote!
Old Tory voters are dying. Every day. I'm not saying this is a good thing because they are probably your granny and grandad, but every single one of them is a lost vote for the Conservatives.
Coupled with Jeremy Corbyn's appeal with the youth, the Tories have decided it's about time to ruddy well do something about getting more young people on side.
Currently at their party conference in Manchester, they are not only are pulling half-arsed policies out of thin air, they're using Instagram and Twitter to prove how down with the kids they are. It's cute, funny even, but also worrying the political party with the biggest vote share can promise so little in an attempt to gain the youth vote.
Tuition fees will be frozen at £9,250
Remember when everyone was happy with paying nine grand a year instead of three? Me neither, so freezing them sounds like a nailed on vote winner.
Omg I am so glad tuition fees are going to be capped at £9, 250. The Tory party really GET me.
— Isabel (@Izzabilla) October 1, 2017
Exam question – should I pay
A) 3 X £9,250 tuition fees by voting Tory
B) £0 tuition fees by voting Labour
Please show your working outs
— Round Like (@RoundLike) October 1, 2017
You will also have to earn slightly more money before you start paying back your loan
Instead of starting to pay back your student loan when your salary reaches £21,000, you'll have to be earning the medium to large amount of £25,000. Shame we'll be fucked by the interest rates, but it's the thought that counts right?
— Lee Parrott (@leeparrott45) September 30, 2017
Raising the Uni tuition fee repayment threshold doesnt help students who have to pay it back, it just allows more time to add on £ interest!
— annie jakeman 🤷🏼♀ (@anniejakeman) October 2, 2017
How are the Tories proving they are real people just like you and me? They've got their own Instagram of course!
So many plandids I don't know what to do with myself. Bet Theresa put this down her group chat asking everyone to give it a like.
They're making an extra £10bn available to help you buy your first home, how thoughtful!
Yep, 135,000 more people will get a low-cost loan to help them buy their first property. I struggle to make rent for my box room in a house with six other people but buying an entire whole house seems manageable now.
I'm loving reading all these articles highlighting the tory problem with young people. They're answer is extending help to buy. Lool #CPC17
— Nomad (@Nomad_LDN) October 2, 2017
Magic money tree found for help to buy, helping young Tory’s onto housing ladder everywhere #bbcdp
— Jane Smith (@housingisaright) October 2, 2017
They're also banning letting fees, because that was the annoying part of paying £700 a month for your shitty flatshare
On average these fees cost £327, which just about makes the difference when half of my salary goes on rent.
Estate agent Tory MP not happy about banning letting agent fees, I wonder why?🙄 https://t.co/qf13ghLgyz
— Gilliane Williams (@GBrightonlaw) September 7, 2017
This bizarre attempt by a Tory councillor to explain how young people have been brainwashed by Labour
— Jon Stone (@joncstone) September 30, 2017
According to this Tory councillor we have been indoctrinated into dirty commie values since our parents started teaching us how to share. Here's the full article, it's really worth a read.
They are severing ties with every Tory university group to "detoxify" their brand
They want to detoxify the Tory brand by severing links, yet invite Katie Hopkins to their conference? https://t.co/gY4Dm8VsSl
— Couldbe Yue (@CouldbeYue) October 3, 2017
Now the Tories don't even want to be associated with the young people in their own party.