I don’t even care if you read clubbers of the week, honestly, I don’t
Your mate who slept with your ex is in this lol
Bobby PalmerDon’t worry, be calm, don’t worry. We’re here. Shush. It’s OK. We’re here.
Here are the best clubbers in the UK this week.
Your Uncle of the week
Haven’t seen him since he used to splash me in the paddling pool!
When your giant loving heart just bleeds through your T-shirt
If it could scream, it would scream LoVe mE
When you and the girls are all about to refill your ink pens
Here’s to learning!!!
When you need to take a UKAD-approved urine test during your night out
Professional athletes can sesh too
What are these boys wearing tonight? Jeans and a nice top!
These lovely lasses know!
Drink our electric potion and be transported with us to the cosmic colony of Contraxia
‘Tis everlasting winter there, but the lights shine so bright so so bright
Is the club photographer pissing on this man?
There used to be rules back in my day
When you and your fiancée are united by your love of E-cigs
I now pronounce you man and VapeLord™
The only way to calm a wrathful purple orb is with some seriously smooth jazz
This is known
When you find some instant pasta so you and your mates and a gorilla all want to celebrate
What the fuck is in these drugs I’m taking
Wait, maybe there’s more to life than shagging women and clubbers of the week?
Better not to think about these things, friend
Featured image courtesy of Tup Tup Palace in Newcastle.
Here’s where else to watch the Outer Banks cast while you wait patiently for season four
Emily SmithFilling the major Pogue shaped hole in my life rn
Phoebe Kowhai
Everything Natalie and Collins have been up to since their disastrous time on MAFS Australia
Harrison BrocklehurstIf I had to hear about Collins discussing OnlyFans, you do too
Everything Richard Gadd has said about Jessica Gunning’s captivating Baby Reindeer performance
Francesca Eke‘It lived and died on Martha and we couldn’t have been luckier’
Okay, so what happens next in the Ellie and Jono cheating saga on MAFS Australia 2024?
Ellie RingJono becomes public enemy number one
The 10 best songs on Taylor Swift’s The Tortured Poets Department, according to streams
Justice for So High School!!!
Jess reveals she and Callum ‘no longer speak’ after he did something ‘unforgiveable’ to her
‘I wouldn’t say he’s a friend’
Hi Barbie! Meet the student who has written her entire dissertation on the Barbie movie
Not her supervisor’s name being Ken!
Holidays and moving in together: Inside Tom and Molly’s adorable post Love Island life
They’re actually too wholesome
Baby Reindeer’s Jessica Gunning has spoken out about people trying to find the real Martha
‘I think it’s a real, real shame, because it shows that they haven’t watched the show properly’
‘Taylor Swift pub’ The Black Dog staff have spoken out about chaotic week mobbed by Swifties
‘We’ve got a Swift half pint on the menu, which people can get for free if they sing a Taylor lyric’
Kim Kardashian is ‘over’ Taylor Swift feud and ‘thinks Taylor should move on’ after new song
Taylor’s new album features a song called ‘thanK you aIMee’ which is believed to be a massive dig at Kim
From tattoos to moving in together: What are Tori and Jack up to after MAFS Australia 2024?
They’re in their own little bubble
More lies Jack from MAFS Australia has been telling his ex have surfaced and it’s chaos
‘He’s only staying with Tori because he’s backed into a corner’
Ben slams Ellie for being ‘vindictive’ on MAFS and claims she’s with Jono for ‘publicity’
‘She always played the victim’
Cast member Ben claims MAFS Australia 2024 producers mocked and ‘criticised’ his ADHD
‘I didn’t sign up to be taken advantage of through my mental health’
A look inside the wholesome life of Jessica Gunning who carried Baby Reindeer as Martha
I can’t believe she’s not actually Scottish
No ifs, no buts: These are the absolute WORST episodes of Black Mirror ever
Black Mirror episode idea: Me being forced to watch these on loop