Dance with them! Dance the dance of life!
Where have all the good men gone? Where are all the gods? Where’s the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?
In 2016, you might think there aren’t many heroes left. You’d be wrong. The real champions nowadays are the clubbers, those who ride out every Friday and Saturday evening on a trusty steed of vodka-and-coke to vanquish boredom on a battlefield bathed in neon lights.
Yes, these are the best clubbers in the UK this week. Excelsior!
Best Jonathan Ross lookalike of the week
Gosh, he really does cut loose, doesn’t he?
You know what I hate more than clubbing?
Club photographers you fucking fuck
This is probably in Coventry or somewhere equally bumout
Who else fights over an Arctic Monkeys album
This bear has killed before and will kill again
Oh, the atrocities those hollow eyes have seen
Alas and alack! The camera flash blinds my eyes!
This wizard has found my one weakness
Oh this bitch thinks she can steal my podium does she?
We’ll see about that love
A pictorial representation of my love life
The guy in the middle is my bad life choices
Don’t talk to me or my sister ever again
We’re fine without you
Crime, officer? We haven’t heard anything about a crime
Nothing to see here, nothing at all
This guy really missed the whole ‘He for She’ thing
She’s a UN Goodwill Ambassador, for Christ’s sake
Me every Saturday morning:
But seriously does anyone know