All the realest tweets about A-level results

‘Queen Elizabeth II didn’t get any A-levels, and look at her now’

8 years ago

It’s that time of year again: 18-year-olds up and down the country are opening those brown paper envelopes with baited breath, ready to find out what their future holds.

Meanwhile, 40-year-old men up and down the country are taking to Twitter to offer their unsolicited advice on their own bad grades, clearing culture and how results don’t really matter anyway.

Here are this morning’s best tweets about the horror that is A-level results.

A-level students: life is a doomed search for meaning. Romance & friendship bring only temporary respite. Your results will not save you.

— Ian Dunt (@IanDunt) August 18, 2016

My A Level hot take: Pitbull doesn't have A Levels and he's Mr 305. We should all be like Pitbull

— Hussein Kesvani (@HKesvani) August 18, 2016

people shouldn't worry too much about exam results. I failed year 12 and now look at me, I cry myself to sleep every night listening to U2

— Liam (@Millxr) August 18, 2016

The story of my own A level results is quite interesting, actually. It begi-

*gets beaten to death*

— Rhodri Marsden (@rhodri) August 18, 2016

My cousin just got into uni and this is the first thing he said ? pic.twitter.com/PRe6TbVY5J

— george kwame (@Jeff_GK) August 18, 2016

I didn't get into Uni but it's FINE because I'm still in loads of debt and made poor life choices during my youth so it's kinda the same

— TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) August 18, 2016

To people with bad results today: don't worry you'll get into a crapper uni through clearing and do a ton of pills during freshers

— kav (@Kav_Kaushik) August 18, 2016

Good luck to everyone getting their A-level results today. Remember, Neil Armstrong didn't get any A-levels, and he walked on the moon.

— Rob Corp ️ (@RobertCorp) August 18, 2016

Get bad results today? Good news: unless your career involves surgery or finance, your degree will make no difference. #alevelresults

— Philly Byrne (@PhilipNByrne) August 18, 2016

If you don't get the exam results you wanted, look at all the Pokemon you collected instead & that will make you feel better. #alevelresults

— Rick Burin (@rickburin) August 18, 2016

Remember, if you don't get the A level results you hoped for today, they're loads easier than they used to be & you're probably a bit thick.

— Nick Pettigrew (@Nick_Pettigrew) August 18, 2016

A level students: whatever your results, remember that Earth is a tiny speck in an infinite vacuum and nothing you do will ever matter

— Stuart Heritage (@stuheritage) August 18, 2016

If your boyfriend or girlfriend got good A-level results today and is off to uni, cherish this time together – you'll be dumped by Christmas

— The Guyliner (@theguyliner) August 18, 2016

'There's always clearing' 'I got 3 Us, now I'm a billionaire' 'Well, there's nothing you can do now' #alevelresults pic.twitter.com/EPGaGeIfv8

— Courtney ✨ (@WaitCourtneyWho) August 17, 2016

If your worried about your A Level results, don't be. I rhymed Rambo with Django and managed to buy a Lambo. You'll be alright. Good luck ❤️

— #WOBBLEOUTNOW (@LethalBizzle) August 18, 2016

Don't worry if your A-Levels aren't what you were hoping for: an adulthood of creeping tragedy awaits everyone, regardless of results.

— James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) August 18, 2016

I aced my A Levels but in some part that was due to inherent socioeconomic privilege. Not sure it's much of a heartwarming anecdote tbh.

— Alan White (@aljwhite) August 18, 2016

Remember kids, Queen Elizabeth II didn't get any A-levels. And look at her now.

— Hugo Rifkind (@hugorifkind) August 18, 2016

Folks if you've buggered up your A-Levels and can't go to university now, you've helped your career prospects and saved £40k of student debt

— Jack (@Debaser92) August 18, 2016

If your A level results are disappointing, don't worry. I got a C and two Us, and I'm currently on a superyacht in the Med.

— Jeremy Clarkson (@JeremyClarkson) August 18, 2016

I remember when I got my A Level results. Twitter wasn't around then so we all had to spend all day calling up journos and celebs for advice

— Tom Peck (@tompeck) August 18, 2016