How to stop creeps from ruining your squad’s night out

Defensive dancing: For when backing off off just isn’t enough


Ever found yourself raving it up in the club with all your friends, living your best life and you notice something in the corner of your eye? A creep is approaching your group. You’ve probably seen them around before – except this time instead of sticking with the rest of their friends they’ve begun to slowly gravitate towards your squad. And suddenly he’s all up in your friends face, trying to grind on her.

So she turns round and gives you the ‘helpmenowfortheloveofgod’ look and you know just what to do. You break out the defensive dancing and the squad descends on that creep in a full-on pincer movement. A couple of minutes and a few elbows later your all at the bar, grabbing more VK’s and ready to continue your night.

Here’s how to go about your night creep-free:

Find your buddy and stick with them

When going out it’s always a good idea to squad up, whether as a big group or a small group. As long as you’ve got someone with you who you can rely on and look out for then it’s all good. Defensive dancing requires at least another person to help you out and the more the merrier.

WILD WEDNESDAY'S W/LAURA ????? #fratfratfrat

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Identify the problem

After a while it’s kind of inevitable that someone wherever you are is gonna come over and try making a move (which is annoying enough) but if they simply won’t leave you alone, or take a hint then you’ve got yourself a problem.

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Alert your club buddy

Usually at this point a quick glance to your club buddy should let them know that it’s time. If they can’t be found then make sure the rest of your squad is aware that something needs to be done. If you’ve been cornered and you’re on your then skip the rest of the steps and just loose your shit and alert everyone else nearby.

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Engage the enemy

This is when you break out the defensive dancing, the main event. Mainly the use of elbows and knees allow you to tactfully shove the creep out of the way and keep them away. Don’t be afraid to send a couple of ‘takeonemorestepandillkillyou’ looks their way either. If it’s proving difficult to get them to move then perform a simple extraction. Just grab your friend, move them out of the way or more preferably get one of your guy friends to take their place instead. After you’ve successfully shoved them out of the way break out the dance circle. Gather your squad round and don’t leave any room for anyone to come over and get in the way. As long as the squad’s on fleek there should be no chance of further interruptions.

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Enjoy the rest of your night

Congratulations! You’ve gotten rid of that creep, bruised some ribs and bonded with your club buddy in the process.

Squad on fleek

Squad on F.L.E.E.K.

Remember that defensive dancing is a necessary break from the fun

Don’t forget that defensive dancing is simply a manoeuvre in order to allow you to enjoy the rest of your night, getting rid of anything unwanted. If anything it allows you to party even more efficiently by removing the usual obstacles that interrupt a night out.

"PITCHERS BITCHES" @_poppyanna @jaaanelouise13

A photo posted by Cameron Scarlett (@cameronscarlett) on