Jonny Long
Jonny Long
Assistant Editor

Jason Derulo allegedly owes a students’ union £20,000

Mmm Whatcha Say? You want your money back?

How to have a threesome without leaving someone out, by the man who did his PhD on threesomes

It will never happen for you, but just in case

Remember all of your favourite Kerrang! bands? This is where they are now

Is Josh Franceschi still likely to steal my girlfriend?

These are officially the best smoking areas in the country, as voted for by you

*Dramatic pause*

A Tory MP has demanded to see what universities will be teaching on Brexit this year

Lecturers are not happy

Private: The Queen owns her own branch of Greggs

Really, how lucky can one person be

Who are the creepy guys thinking the ‘Skeleboner’ is the perfect Halloween costume?

‘The funny side of Halloween is here!’

Imagining what it would be like to take your uni on a first date

Gutted if you’re St Andrews

What your Cov Uni sports society says about you

Seriously tho why do all the netball girls look the same?

‘Prosecco drunk’ is a thing and it’s been proven by actual, real-life science

I knew I wasn’t making it up

Universities will be fined for no-platforming controversial speakers

The government are forcing unis to tackle safe space culture

Which is the undisputed best club smoking area in the entire country?

Let’s be honest, they’re better than the actual club

Can you tell what flavour a Greggs bake is just by looking at it?

It’s time to put your Greggs knowledge to the test

Here are the best tweets from people freaking the fuck out about the red sky

We’re all definitely about to die

Wearing boat shoes and no socks has caused a foot fungus epidemic

What will I wear with my chinos now

Your seemingly normal choice of iconic British lunch reveals who you really are as a person

Getting a Boots meal deal is borderline psychopathic

Are you actually more Northern or Southern?

IS IT A BREAD ROLL OR IS IT A BARM I JUST DON’T KNOW ANYMORE

Everything that definitely happened on your Duke of Edinburgh expedition

Waterproof trousers are not a look

Why does literally everyone go ‘woo!’ when we pop a bottle? We asked an expert

*Pop* Woo!

Take this ultimate club banger quiz to prove how classic you really are

Here are the bangers, now let’s get mashed