Screw London, I’m moving to Brighton

Everyone is a million times cheerier


London is the natural progression for “young professionals”. It’s fast-paced, busy, crowded. All the things we think we want bursting out of school or uni, ready to grab on to the carousel and cling on for dear life, as the months start to feel like weeks and the weeks start to pass like days.

Brighton is an underrated haven of good life quality. The night life is epic and diverse. The food is meticulously thought out and delicious. You have the option to head to Churchill Square for your essentials, but you can turn up to your Friday night drinks in a vintage dress you picked up from the Lanes. We are all deluded: Brighton is the new London.

The Lanes

There is legitimately nothing more quaint than Brighton’s lanes. Jam packed with everything from delicious restaurants to vintage shops to big brands like Mac. The endless spiralling passageways look like something out of Harry Potter, and you have more types of shops than you can shake a stick at. Fudge, magic, vintage, chocolate. You name it, the Lanes probably has it.

The stress levels are lower

In Brighton, the unwarranted levels of urgency – clutched in the grips of Londoners everywhere they go – just doesn’t exist. In Brighton everyone’s too busy doing yoga and practicing mindfulness.

The sea

Need I say more?

The rent is so much more reasonable

In London, you rent a box for £600-700pcm. In Brighton you have a greater degree of choice in where you live, without bankrupting yourself within a second of getting paid.

Choccywoccydoodah

Choccywoccydoodah is a palace of chocolatey dreams. There’s often a bottleneck with people stopping to stare in awe at the window display. If you get a  Choccywoccydoodah cake at your birthday party, you can be pretty sure you’re nailing life.

It is home to the oldest working cinema in Europe

The Duke of York opened in 1910, and is the oldest continually-operating cinema in the whole of Europe. It also has this cute little statue with moving legs.

You can walk everywhere

Well, you kind of can’t, but at least you don’t have to get onto a tube to see anyone, like you do in London. You can get buses and they’ve made parking pretty impossible and/or expensive. This sounds like a bad thing but just think of the…

Attempts to tackle pollution

Brighton’s policies lead to the presence of loads of green areas, restrictions on driving, clean sea air and – unlike in London – you don’t feel like you have to wash your hands every hour.

It’s artsy to the core

Buddies 24-hour breakfasts

Upon leaving Brighton, I discovered (to my horror) that Buddies is not a chain but a stand-alone 24-hour restaurant. Sat charmingly on Brighton’s seafront, within stumbling distance of most of Brighton’s main clubs, Buddies will serve you a fry up, complete with a comforting cup of tea or glass of water. They have about 50 lined up ready to rehydrate you. What more could you want after a night out than a fry up/sit down dinner with your friends.

You’re only 10 minutes from the downs

Bored of city life? You are a stone’s throw from Sussex’s rolling hills.

The Pier

There’s something about the pier that just makes you feel the excitement of a six-year-old all over again. Candy floss, fresh donuts, fish and chips, an arcade and rides. What more could you want?!

The live music scene

Brighton is awash with buskers, filling the streets with free little shows.

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The nightlife

Ranging from Hip Hop spun off a record player at Concorde, to the latest Bass at Patterns – Brighton caters for all music tastes. At Patterns they even have a night for young parents to bring their babies, called “Buggied out”.

Summer festivals

Brighton is really emerging on the festival scene. Topping the list are Boundary, Together the People, Pride and many more.

It’s the only Green Party-led city in the UK

Brighton holds the only green seat – proving it is a place of humanitarian and enlightened. Even if you aren’t a Green supporter yourself, you’ve got to admit you’d enjoy living in a place where the environment is the key focus, and not money.

There’s a building that looks like the freaking Taj Mahal

The Brighton Pavilion was formerly a royal residence, which started being built in 1787. Apparently nearly half a million people visit the Pavilion every year.

Fish and chips

This is self-explanatory. You can’t beat fish and chips by the seaside.

Pride

The beauty of Pride is the involvement of everyone celebrating. It’s not a festival solely for LGBT+ people, there are kids dancing in the parade, people lining the streets, rainbow flags, banners, colourful costumes and music all weekend.

London is scary

There we 740,725 crimes committed in London over the past year. In 2013, the crimes per 100 people in London was 42.53/100 residents. Brighton? 6.6/100 residents. Be afraid, Londoners, be afraid.