A look at the most unfortunate club night names of all time
Would you rather go to YOLO or WetYourSelf?
This week, our hearts were stolen by a lovely old Polish couple who went to Fabric for the night.
We then wished our eyes had been stolen too, so we wouldn’t have to what the event was called.
However it did get us thinking – what are the most all-out idiotic event names the UK has ever seen?
After a bit of digging, we present you with the best of the worst club nights of all time.
Lets Get Silly, Blackpool
You can never unsee this poster.
P.U.L.L, St Andrews
The cringiest thing about St Andrews’ SU club night wasn’t that it was called P.U.L.L, or even that it was deemed sexist and forced to change to the much more innocent “The Bop”.
The cringiest thing was that it genuinely stood for “Postgraduates and Undergraduates Loving Life“.
Brothel Broke, Edinburgh
The saga of Brothel Broke is a glorious one, which all started when the event advertised free entry for the “sluttiest-dressed bird” or any woman who wrote “I’m a prostitute on their Facebook page”.
After a torrent of unexpected criticism, they changed the name to “PC Broke: no Alcohol, Women or Banter”, and then to just “Broke”.
As one chirpy organiser wrote: “Jesus Christ, we changed the event, what more do you want? Go and play Warhammer or something.”
Dead Rappers Night, Bristol
In a classic game of “How offensive can you go?”, Bristol nightclub Lakota came under fire for their “Dead Rappers Night” theme.
Mainly because they asked guests to turn up with toy guns, “hella bling” and, ahem, “merky face paint”.
Get Brained, Lincoln
Certainly not offensive enough to warrant it getting banned. Certainly not a good club name either.
Bitch Slap, Edinburgh
People complained about the name of this Edinburgh night, to which the promoter responded: “”It’s got absolutely nothing to do with berating women or anything like that.”
The Facebook page of Naked Newcastle features inspirational quotes like “Beauty without depth is just decoration”, right next to pictures of women’s bare arses.
Bounce By The Ounce, Preston
Actually, we have absolutely nothing wrong with this. Carry on.
Kick In The Ballads, Preston
Another of Preston’s finest, this one is at a place called The Ferret (so it must be good).
Fuck Off I’m Antisocial, Sheffield
Not exactly the worst name ever, but when you print it on door hangers and distribute it around suburban areas it isn’t exactly the best.
As one 61-year-old resident put it: “The message that it purports to send from the occupants of each house is offensive.”
National Cleavage Weekender, Rochester
This is an actual event that was actually allowed to happen.
When your SU night is called The Lash, you probably assume you’ve gone about as cringe as you can go.
Then the night’s name was changed to YOLO, and the students of Cardiff recoiled in horror.
Freshers Violation, Leeds
Ministry Of Pound, Norwich
Try harder than this.
In what would prove to be its fatal mistake, notorious Leeds club night Tequila were set upon after hosting their “Freshers Violation” event, and releasing a rape joke-riddled video afterwards for all to see.
Shit Night Out, Exeter
Ahhh, we see what you did there.
Shag A Ginger, Donegal
The good people of Donegal were up in arms when Pulse announced a new student night – called “Shag A Ginger”.
Not only could gingers get in free before midnight, but non-redhead punters could have their hair dyed ginger by the club’s own “hairdressing team”.
The night did not take place.