Got lucky from Tinder? You’re probably riddled with STIs

And you should ask any Tinder matches whether they’ve done it up the bum


Everybody’s favourite paper, The Daily Mail, has outrageously claimed hook-up apps are causing STI levels to skyrocket. 

The Mail’s shock statement comes after cases of gonorrhoea increased 15 per cent and cases of syphilis increased 9 per cent between 2012 and 2013.

According to them, apps like Tinder and Grindr are making casual sex more “normal”.

Even though there’s no actual evidence to suggest that there’s any direct correlation between hook-up apps and STIs, Public Health England think Tinder and Grindr enabled the “hyper-efficient transmission” of infection.

Matt on Tinder

But does the guy on the left have gonorrhea?

Peter Greenhouse, of the British Association for Sexual Health and HIV, said: “You don’t have to be a genius to work out that these sorts of apps make having casual sex a damn sight easier.

“Thanks to Grindr or Tinder, you can acquire chlamydia in five minutes.”

Not content with ruining the fantasy of finding Mr Right-Swipe, the killjoys then offer astonishingly out-of-touch advice about safe sex.

Using a video which looks like it was produced before most Tinder users were born, The Mail then proves how little it understands young people with a howcast video on safe sex.

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Is he Shwyn-ming in STDs?

Featuring pensioners drinking tea, the weird clip instructs viewers to exchange sexual histories, question their partner’s thoughts on anal sex, and ask if they’ve ever had sexual contact with a sex worker – an outlandish chat-up technique even for Tinder.

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‘I’m clean and don’t fuck hookers’

The video peculiarly describes sexually transmitted infections to shots of tea and cake – ending with a bizarre “did you know” about Syphilis related deaths.

We are told gonorrhea – which causes infertility – can be treated with antibiotics, but fears are growing over a rise in antibiotic resistent gonorrhea.

But that’s not as bad as Syphilis, which blinds you, causes brain damage, or just kills you.