‘I would take a giant needle in the arse to save a rabbit’s life’: Meet the animal activists changing the world

An activist group branded “repulsive” has a new plan to stop animal testing — they’re offering themselves up for vivisection. 

Clueless animal activist group NOAV are sending petitions to labs at Oxford, Cambridge, Edinburgh, King’s and Imperial asking to stand in as test subjects.

They are so keen to save the lives of animals, the campaign’s spokesman said he would “absolutely” take an injection in the arse to protect just one rabbit.

Asked if he would be willing to undergo the procedures in the picture above, NOAV campaigner William Lyons said: “I’d imagine it would be quite stressful.

“But yes, I would absolutely put myself in a rabbit’s place.

“If that was the only way to protect that rabbit, then yes, I would take the injection and anything else.

“I would know what’s going on but an innocent rabbit isn’t consenting and doesn’t understand so it’s likely to be a lot less stressful for me.”

Our interview was cut short when William’s phone rung off.

He returned five minutes later and said: “I had to go out and buy some more credit.”

William, 25, added: “Animal testing is ridiculous. Vivisection involving any animal is a really horrid waste of life.

“What we’re doing is a genuine offer but whether it’s something a lab would take us up on is another matter.”

NOAV’s Facebook page hosts this video called “Love for animals, anger when they are abused”.

If this doesn’t convince you to surrender yourself for scientific experiments to save animals, nothing will.

NOAV made headlines last month when they offered students cash in exchange to “shop” their teachers experimenting on animals.

The group — described by students as “repulsive and unthinking” — said they would pay for pictures and personal info of any lab workers involved in animal testing.

William said: “In the beginning we came off as threatening so we’re shelving the idea of doing naming and shaming for now.”

Campaign boss James Westwood added: “If these people must sadistically torture someone, let it be us instead of the animals.”

They ask in exchange for being used as experiments the release of the animals to “loving homes”.

This comes a year after The Tab’s investigation into animal testing in unis.

It found over a million animals are used each year for experiments — a quarter million of which are killed at Edinburgh.

Sign up to NOAV’s petition here.