Thoughts every UD student has over Thanksgiving break

I missed home so much

Home. Where your pet greets you like they haven’t seen you in years. Where the shower pressure is always strong and the temperature is always hot. Where your family smothers you with unconditional love and home-cooked meals. Where your bed feels like a tower of clouds on a mountain of feathers. You’ll reminisce on childhood memories with old friends and have mixed emotions about not being 12 anymore.

I have so much work to do and I ain’t doing it

This is the time to relax, spend time with friends and family, and eat massive amounts of food while binge-watching Netflix until you pass out on the couch. Forget about school. As far as your professors know, you live in a remote village with no electricity and they’ll be lucky if you even come back alive to participate in that group project. You’re all going to give each other an A in the peer evaluation anyway.

Thanksgiving is dope

Where else are you served a 10-course meal for free? When else is it appropriate to watch a 50-foot Barney fly down the streets of Manhattan? Why do we eat bread out of a turkey’s butthole and call it Stuffing? These answers simply do not matter when it comes to Thanksgiving. Just pretend you like football, help peel potatoes, avoid politics, and everything will be fine—until you realize:

Thanksgiving is weird…

You start to wonder why exactly you are eating bread out of a turkey’s butthole (something about moisture, but then that grosses you out even more). You begin to think about the underlying implications of this holiday: the enslavement and genocide of Native Americans by the Pilgrims. Uncle Bobby has his socks off at the dinner table and you’re ready to plan your escape to your room.

I can’t wait for winter holidays

With Thanksgiving underway, winter holidays become more and more acceptable to think about. Wreaths and decorations go up the day after Turkey Day, and the dust comes off the menorahs in preparation for those eight glorious nights. Festive music fills every store—except Friday, when the only sounds you can hear are the screams of angry shoppers as they tear through the mall like carpenter ants.

I’m ready to get the fuck back to school

Being home is going to get boring: it’s inevitable. Ten days? I haven’t had that much free time since before I can remember. No one likes being told to do their dishes, clean their room, or to get out of bed because “it’s 1 PM” and you’re “sleeping the day away.” You want to get back to the place where it’s okay to go out on a Tuesday and the most responsible person you live with is your 21-year-old roommate who only slightly has their life more together than you do.