Why I wore a skirt to Lawnparties

An interview with Aamir Zainulabadeen about his interesting and intriguing fashion choices

You might remember him from last week’s article about the best looks at Fall Lawnparties; Aamir Zainulabadeen is not one to shy away from exciting looks. As a followup to his amazing Lawnparties look, I decided to interview him and learn more about his personal style.

Tell me a little more about your Lawnparties look. Why did you choose the skirt?

“My Lawnparties look actually came about from a desire to experiment with my gender presentation and see how people reacted. I have the extreme privilege as identifying and presenting as a cisgendered male, so I wanted to see how people would react to my non-binary look (a woman’s skirt with a male shirt).
“I was actually going to wear my running clothes to Lawnparties because it was VERY humid, but I visited my friend Sarah Wang across the hall and I was mentioning wanting to ‘play’ with my gender presentation this. She replied by lending me her beautiful skirt. I have never felt more comfortable! Skirts are amazingly comfy! “

 How did people respond to your Lawnparties outfit?

“Most of the reactions were positive. One of my friends questioned my gender identity (which is still cisgender male). I had only one negative reaction, which surprisingly enough came in the language I speak at home (Urdu/Hindi). This person looked at me angrily and asked, ‘Larki hei kiya larka hei’ which translates to ‘Are you a boy or a girl?’
“The tone and framing of this question angered me greatly and I wanted to respond angrily, but I just kept walking. I can’t even imagine what it is like for non-binary or transgender people that have to deal with comments like that on a daily basis. I learned to have much more empathy for these people after this experience.”

Who or what was the style inspiration for your Lawnparties aesthetic?

“The style came from very strong women that I have seen in my family. These women were professionals and also raised me growing up, they would wear blouses and saris to work. My look echoes that strength, the kind that transcends gender. I wore a shirt with a male cut but flowers embroidered into the cuffs and collar. I wore the black skirt as a counterweight to that maleness and the pink scarf and bandanas were for extra flair. The orange hat for Princeton.
“I have never worn this outfit before, it came organically from what I had in my closet and how I felt. My friend described my style as a professional housewife from the 1800’s — which was absolutely flattering! I love to cook and clean, they are very therapeutic activities. I envision that if I get married (to a man) I will most likely be a house husband for a while when we adopt children (this schedule works for those interested in academia). “

How would you generally describe your style?

“My style is generally very casual. I usually wear a t-shirt and jeans or athletic shorts. I only really dress up for special occasions, religious holidays, or Friday Prayer (because I’m Muslim). “

Could you discuss your faith, and what impact, if any, it has on your aesthetic?

“I am a practicing Muslim as well as openly Homosexual. I am still not out to certain members of my family, because it would hurt them very much to learn that I am Gay (due to cultural attitudes on sexuality in South Asia when they grew up). My faith certainly has an impact on my aesthetic because it calls me to act and dress humbly.
I am an imperfect being and I recognize that the ‘Lawnparties look’ was not the most humble, but I’m working on it. I’m working towards a more positive (but also humble) expression of my sexuality.
“My faith also calls me to be bold and to stand up to injustice. You can often find me wearing my traditional robes on Friday because I am deliberate in actively presenting as Muslim. I wore the ‘Lawnparties look’ because people need to look past their gendered notions of fabric to human character. Clearly people still have a lot to learn about gender.
“In all things, I devote myself to The Most High and I pray daily for the reduction and annihilation of narcissism and ego from my heart.  I try to look in the mirror less often. While I do put some care into my looks, I try to minimize the validation that I draw from my physical appearance, because that is not what matters. Life is transient, your looks, fabrics, wealth, and positions fade — but I would like to believe that your gratitude, capacity for love, and marks of compassion do not fade.”

 Do you have any favorite looks? And why is it your favorite?

“Honestly, the Lawnparties look is my favorite so far. I have never felt as comfortable and dangerous as when I wore that outfit. I was telling all the people that denied me, that I am not afraid of them. I was telling all the people that accepted me that I have come to accept myself.”

Any fashion tips or suggestions for those interested by your style?

“Sure thing! Comfort and hygiene come before looks. Don’t spend hours trying to look good for someone else. I never wear makeup and I don’t feel the need to use expensive facial scrubs (though I still wash my face with plenty of water daily).
“If you like my style, go buy a few pairs of compression shorts and cut the sleeves off of your t-shirts. Be at peace! If you want to be extra fancy you can get some of the bandanas that are featured in the ‘Lawnparties look’ at the Dollar Store.  If anyone criticizes how you dress, tell them that they have no power over your decisions. “
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Princeton University