What your New Years resolutions say about you

Every year you have them, and every year you lose them. New Year’s Resolutions are a continuous cycle of hope and failure that begins at the stroke of midnight and ends after the first month or two of the year. It can be said that this process reveals defining characteristics of who you are as a person, depending on your what you choose to do. So whether your goal is to be an exercise enthusiast or a homebody with a dream, we’ve broken down exactly what your resolution says about the person you are and who you (might) want to be.

Have somewhat of an exercise routine

You are driven enough to know that routine exercise is good for you and that you should do it, but sometimes your drive is stifled by the comforting arms of your bed. While a rocking body might be ideal, you justify skipping the gym by reminding yourself that curves are indeed, really sexy. While the first three to seven weeks of the New Year are going to make your body feel amazing, you recognize that you might fall victim to laziness like every other year. The hope that this year might be different will keep you strong.

Eat healthier

As the person who only comes to the party for the food, having a healthier diet has always been eating at the back of your mind. You frequently enjoy short walks to the refrigerator, and your most shared memes are related to food. Whether your goal is to eat meals that equate you to a health deity, or converting to a diet that excludes one of the major food groups, the loss will affect your mood greatly, and you’ll find your mind constantly wandering.

Study more often

You love to socialize and party, and your grades reflect it. The Dean’s List is the ultimate goal, and you really want to bring back an A on a ten-page paper to hang on your parents’ fridge. You’re feeling hopeful about this resolution, out of all the friends you have, at least one of them must actually study on Tuesdays.

Leave the house

Contrary to the latter, Netflix and chill is a deed you spend doing for the most part, alone. You might have plenty of willing friends, but going out seems like a great idea until you actually have to move. This year will be different though, you’ll be attending a great number of parties, but not any ones on New Year’s Eve. After all, December 31st isn’t technically the year 2017 yet — it doesn’t count.

Call your mom more often

You love your mom, you really do. It’s just sometimes the distractions of the day are, well, distracting. It’s an honest mistake when you go three weeks with no contact, and she has to send you a message asking if you’re still alive. This year, you’re going to save yourself a scolding and your mother a few panic attacks, and now you’ll set aside at least twenty minutes a week to tell your mom that you can still afford your rent, even if you don’t have any groceries.

Be a little less judge-y

This is a fake resolution, and you know it. Oh well.