The things at BU I trust more than the new Secretary of Education

In honor of this shockingly scary confirmation, here are the things at BU I trust more than Betsy DeVos, our new Secretary of Education.

Any person passing out flyers at the GSU

Think about it- have you ever seen the tables at the GSU empty? Every club and sorority has sat there day after day, politely begging people to join their organizations. Some sneakily bribe the masses with food, while others hand out flyers to hundreds of students who probably don’t want them. Still, I’d nominate any of them over Betsy DeVos, because at least they’d have actual experience in education (#proudtoBU).

The melon at the dining hall that’s somehow ALWAYS in season

I used to think that fruit could go out of season, until I got to BU. There is always fresh cantaloupe and honeydew at the salad bar. It could be the middle of January, and there’s still tons of melon at all three dining halls. It’s not like it goes bad either, even though it is technically “in season” during the summer. But I’m not going to question why (or how) we have it year round, because the answer may turn me off of melon forever.

The person who says they have their life together

College is the time to make mistakes and figure out your passions. At BU it’s easy to feel like everyone else has it all together, but trust me they really don’t. If you overhear people spreading these alternative facts just remember that inside everyone is internally crying over grade deflation and homework.

The BU Wifi

No matter how many times you connect to BU (802.1x) your phone will switch it to literally any other wifi network. You don’t even have to do anything and your phone will switch it for your automatically. It doesn’t matter if you’re about to finish a 10 page paper or submit a lab. Like Betsy DeVos, the wifi really doesn’t care about your education.

People who ride the elevator to the 2nd floor

This one is self explanatory. And if you live in Warren, please don’t even think about taking the elevator if you live on a single digit floor. Sadly, these people are still better than the new chief of our education system.

People who Uber from West Campus

Again, this is self explanatory. The walk from West to CAS sucks, especially in the middle of Boston’s unpredictable winter. But I guess if you don’t want to walk those extra four blocks, go ahead! As extra as it is, I’d still Uber to class with these people because at least they don’t pretend to be experts on education.

The BU Shuttle

You can wait 25 minutes for the BU shuttle, and it still might not show up. To pass the time, count how many “Out of Service” busses creep by. Maybe even read up on the qualifications of our new Secretary of Education (spoiler: there aren’t any). Don’t worry BU Shuttle, we’ll wait for you for as long as you want, because unlike Betsy DeVos, we can actually count on you.