Why Willow will always be the best club in York

From the first time you stumble up those infamous stairs, The Willow appeared to be nothing more than La Senza’s grotty loft, kitted out with a few metres of fairy lights. But over time, the Willow Disco became a drunken paradise which held a dear place in many of our hearts.

As top bae and owner of The Willow Tommy Fong confirms that the lease from Aviva has long-expired and they need to vacate the premises, we thought we’d commemorate its status as the pinnacle of York nightlife.

It’s Small

We’ve all had those nights out in Revs or Salvation where we’ve spent the entire night doing circuits of the club looking for that one friend who keeps wandering off like a senile goat.

Size doesn’t matter. This makes going to the toilet, buying drinks and talking to strangers much easier, as there is no obligation of sticking with the group you came with.

Ironically, Willow’s lack of space facilitates freedom at its finest.

The Music

Probably the best part of Willow.

Granted, the DJ never listens to your requests but you always know what you’re going to get. It’s cheesy, but it’s great. Like a tray of cheesy chips.

You can literally see people sprinting to the dance floor for their favourites, whether it’s Blank Space or Come on Eileen. It’s as if they’ve found their calling in life. Tommy’s got all your favourites, and they are songs you can actually dance to.

I daresay the playlist has been intricately formulated by a team of neuro-scientists. You will shake it like your 2:1 depends on it, meaning that you’ll have properly worked for that garlic bread and cheese.

There’s a designated DMC zone

Despite its small size, Willow’s chair game surpasses that of any club endorsed by YUSU.

If for some bizarre reason you are not feeling the music, you can always head to Willow’s upstairs seating area for some passionate drunken conversations you definitely won’t remember. Or even better, to take a nap.

Whether you need to take a break from your reckless dancing, quickly chug back some more sambucas or exchange bodily fluids with a hottie, upchairs is always there for you.

 Low Prices

Willow is famous for its economical shots.

The primary offerings are sambuca and tequila, but if after freshers week you can no longer stomach them, feel free to branch out to Bailey’s and Apple Sourz.

And if you’re looking for something to soften the blow of that lethal seventh sambuca, Willow provides an array of perfect chasers you can choose from – whether it’s a can of Vimto or just another fruity shot.

Not only are the shots low-priced, entry is a total steal. All you have to do is remember to get there before midnight on a weekday and you get into the wonderful world of Willow for only £2.

You’ll always know someone

You can go every night of the week and there will always be one twat you recognise vaguely enough to hug.

Those special moments when you embrace someone you’ve hardly spoken to from your seminar and both exclaim how amazing it is that you both happen to be there, despite it being quite a likely occurrence, are all too common.

On the rare nights that you don’t know anyone, it’s always easy to make new friends – meaning the more you Willow the more you know.

At least 60% of interactions in Willow are excitable, hysterical ones between people who loosely recognise each other, and it’s fucking marvellous.

Tommy Fong

Tommy’s always up for banter and he knows his regulars.

Probably the biggest BNOC going, Tommy Fong is infamous among the student populous and if you ask him really nicely, he’ll offer a selfie.

You have to hand it to him, he’s put up with a lot of drunken messes over the years, and yet he always seems to be smiling. Probably because he has a cracking retirement fund.

It’s Open Late 

Later than the others, Willow won’t send you home until 4am. This means you can always go there if you go to a dire student night first. We’re talking Revs/Salvation/Kuda/Fibbers/any other York Parties shite.

Unfortunately, it does mean that Efe’s will be closed if you tank your way to 4am, but there’s always McDonalds, Oki’s or Deniz’s to get that holy chicken burger with extra mayonnaise.

There you have it – Willow really is perfect, and we don’t know how we’ll cope without it. Probably by gathering confused outside its old entrance, crying and longing for its filthy charm..

All we do know is that the day that York is without its legendary Willow Disco will be a sad day for all.