What it’s like to go clubbing when you have claustrophobia

Claustrophobia affects about 10% of the UK population – and it’s more than just being afraid of lifts (although I do hate them, too). It is an irrational fear that can affect you in different and inconsistent ways, from disliking public toilets to a fear of flying. When it comes to going out, navigating the club scene when I feel claustrophobic can be tricky.

Claustrophobia is essentially a fear of confined spaces, and you may say: “but clubs aren’t even small rooms” – well, this is true, and I’m sure there are many individuals who suffer from claustrophobia that are also absolutely fine clubbing. However for me, the combination of dark rooms with loud music and large masses of gyrating people can be overwhelming, and makes me feel trapped. This is not helped by the fact that I am five-foot-three and can spend large portions of my night with my head in someone else’s armpit.

When coming to university, it never occurred to me that clubbing would be problematic. In my home town I rarely go clubbing, and if I do the clubs near me are very small and pretty dead. So university was my first experience of large nightclubs. I remember walking into a club in Leeds and being completely shocked by the shear mass of people. It was immediately clear I was going to be in for an anxiety ridden night.

Now that I’m more used to clubbing, I often feel totally fine – as long as I don’t get caught in a mosh pit and can see the exit clearly. Yes, I do position myself within sight of an escape plan. In fact it’s the first thing I do when I get into a club, I work out exactly how I can get out if I feel overwhelmed, and always make sure I can see that exit.

I have always preferred quieter clubs because of this and I will completely freak out if I get caught in a large throng of people. I also tend to linger at the back or on the edge of the main body of people dancing, so that I have plenty of room to showcase some pretty killer moves, but really it’s so I can focus on breathing properly.

Although I am getting better, there have been times when I haven’t been able to keep my anxiety in check and twice in the past three months I have fainted while on a night out because I have felt so claustrophobic and anxious that I’ve been unable to breathe properly. Once I was queuing to get into a club on my birthday, the queue was very tight and I was surrounded by people much taller than me who kept pushing, and I started to panic because all I could see was back of some guy’s bomber jacket. On the second occasion I got caught in a very large group of people at the front of the SU, I felt like I couldn’t breathe or move and I wasn’t sure how to get out. The next thing I remember I was being shaken awake by my friends and a concerned first-aider.

On both occasions I think the people around me who saw me faint must have presumed that I was very drunk and had passed out, no one would have taken a second to consider that it was anxiety that was forcing me to stop enjoying the sultry tones of Rihanna. Many people who go clubbing forget that there are people around them who could be feeling anxious or suffering from something more serious than one too many VK’s.

So while you are pushing and shoving to get to front of the club, please remember that there may be people around you who are trying to enjoy a night out with their friends while simultaneously keeping their anxiety in check.