Club night of the year nomination: Smack me every Tuesday

You don’t choose Smack Tuesday, Smack Tuesday chooses you


As the year draws to a close, we begin ranking the best and worst nights out Leamington, Coventry, Birmingham and Warwick Campus have to offer. Reviewing the – apparently – 7th best club in the world, Alick McCallum makes a case for Tuesdays at Smack. 

The week starts on Tuesday right? Monday is weekend hangover day and there’s fuck all to do at night unless you enjoy half empty, pop heavy impersonal clubs.

Sure Bubble Luv has 80p shots, but no one goes into a night out excited to consume copious amounts of standard neat whiskey and vodka. What gets people excited? VodBulls sold for only one meagre coin of our finest English tender.

LED lights synced to the music. Say what?

That’s right – at Smack, on a Tuesday, any sensible individual may trade a single pound sterling for the much more luscious, friendly and heart-warming beverage that consists of Vodka and Red Bull, or perhaps an alternative cheaper, but not sub-standard, energy drink. Smack wasn’t awarded the 7th best nightclub in the world for nothing.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is just the tip of the fun-filled iceberg.

Smack Tuesdays is not simply a night-out, it’s an experience, some may even say a religion. Every Tuesday at about 8pm hordes of eager students can be found taking their weekly pilgrimage to Duke to pay homage to the Lord that presides over the night.

There you will find them smiling and buying their £5 Smack queue jumps that are served generously with three complimenting vodka mixers. Their pre-drinks have begun and they know the treat that is waiting for them.

They know

Come 11pm the same hordes of Smack worshippers begin their journey back to the promise land and when they pass the monochrome gates, and smiling bouncers, (it’s not unthinkable that I may be embellishing the truth) they enter Leamington’s very own Shangri-La.

On entry you are not confronted with the clogged up entrance of Smack Thursdays. On this night there is no predatory photographer waiting to take your clans photo in front of the admittedly cool prison mugshot wall. Instead you may take a photo of your own or pass through at your own free will without crowds of friends clawing to be next in line for photos.

Is that a non-congested photo I see?

From there you walk up the sacred staircase and enter another realm welcomed by the angelic voices of light house mixes coupled with established bangers if you will. There’s enough bass knocking about to get those feet moving, but not so much that you might think you’ve stumbled upon Leeds’ edgy garage and grime night by accident.

If that’s not your thing then Smack has been gracious enough to offer a different room and a different vibe. The notoriously popular downstairs pumps out a stream of urban and RnB tunes and the LED walls dance along in time to the beats of each song individually, inspired by a higher force.

When Smack’s devout followers are danced out they can retire briefly to the smoking area. Indeed, it may not be the most visually appealing and no, it may not serve food, but Smack’s smoking area can hold its head high. Its lack of décor, the iron gates on its periphery and the rained on puddled floor are not negatives – they give it character.

The smoking area does not try to be anything it’s not and that is why it succeeds. The open sky and cool air are perfect for a break from the noise inside and ideal for a chat with friends and strangers alike.

A smoking area rendezvous

Smack your Tuesday about a bit. Get to Smack.

Look out for the ‘Ultimate Leamington Night Out’ competition, upcoming in Week 9.