I ate 11,000 calories in one day

Do not try this at home


Eating challenges are nothing new, and there’s plenty of spots around Nottingham you can pick up a crippling calorie laden meal to impress your mates with. But there are those that like to go above and beyond the mere burger challenge of Rose and Crown. Some go to Olympic levels.

After news that successful Olympian, Michael Phelps consumes a record 12,000 calories per day, UoN Physics student Harry thought he would spend a Sunday challenging himself to match it.

Here’s the menu to mirror the champion swimmers own diet:

Porridge – 600 cal

2 cheese and egg toasties – 1,000 cal

2 cheese and ham sandwiches (extra butter) – 1,000 cal

Omelette (6 eggs) – 600 cal

2lbs of pasta – 3,000 cal

1 pizza – 2,000 cal

3 slices French toast – 650 cal

3 chocolate chip pancakes with ice cream – 600 cal

4 energy drinks – 1,550 cal

Naturally, Phelps runs on a strict routine, but Harry is a student with a body clock to match, so didn’t start until 11am. This pushed his finishing time to an eye watering 2am the next morning. But pizza at 2am is a standard anyway, right?

To begin his mammoth morning of food, Harry cracked straight on with the porridge which he topped with banana because; potassium.

Nutritious

After the hearty breakfast, a cheese and egg toastie was next on the menu before a long hour of contemplation. After trying to make the difficult decision whether to head to the gym or eat another 1,000 calories, Harry landed on cheese and ham sandwiches, with extra butter – obviously.

So many sarnies

Having successfully put away his third meal of the day, Harry headed to the gym for 2 hours of weights and cardio. However, the influx of carbs left him feeling weak and less than on form, “a 3000 calorie breakfast not the way forward for successful gym sesh.”

But, after a quick break to watch some inspirational Usain Bolt videos, he was right back in there with the routine and stopped to pick up some energy drinks on his way home. Four of them.

Due to the late start, the stats at this point rested at 5:30pm on challenge day, 7,000 calories still to go.

Ploughing on, Harry went for a slightly burnt six egg omelette, complete with brown sauce. “I was getting hungry again so the omelette went down nicely.”

Despite popular opinion this is indeed an omelette, I think

At this point, Harry treated himself to a deserved hour’s break, in which he made a plan of action for the rest of his big night in. As he sat sipping energy drinks, optimism joined the cocktail of sugar and caffeine flooding his brain, leaving him feeling “a solid 60 per cent chance of success at this point.”

After a day of savoury, carb ridden meals and a self-confirmed sweet tooth, Harry welcomed the dessert portion of the menu. Cinnamon and vanilla French toast swiftly followed up with chocolate chip pancakes – a delicious 1,250 calories, buzzed through within minutes.

Tasted better than it looks

But alas..

“Then I started to feel a bit funny.”

In an attempt to “combat diabetes” Harry put his sugar high to use on a 45 minute brisk walk, before returning home and taking another 30 minutes to mentally prepare for the last hurdles of the challenge. The pasta and pizza.

At 10pm, the decision was taken to speed eat the mammoth 2lbs of pasta smothered with an “overly rich sauce”, in an attempt to “not allow my body to comprehend what was happening.”

A few minutes of watching what can only be described as a spectacle, Harry was 3/4s of the way through. However, swallowing the last quarter proved a struggle, 10 minutes in and the aforementioned sauce had to go. A quick rinse under the tap (yum) and he managed to get the rest down.

9,000 calories down, Harry slipped into a food coma. Harry contemplated failure. Harry had a 20 minute cold shower to seriously re evaluate his choices.

But he’d come too far.

Experiencing an unfamiliar disdain for pizza, Harry trudged through the Chicago Town, deep dish beef brisket pizza one slice at a time. Each slice took longer than the last with the final piece taking a solid half an hour.

Can I help you with this one?

At 2am the challenge was complete and Harry had made it to the big leagues.

Harry at his happiest: eating (elf ears optional)

Afterwards, he felt awful: “There was about 10 seconds before I was spectacularly sick. I knew during the last slice a chunder was inevitable. My goal was to get it down though, I’d come this far.”

Housemate Mark, a continued support throughout the challenge said: “For a few moments he stood as tall as Michael Phelps, a proud few seconds before a gold medal worthy chunder erupted.”

When asked if he would recommend the challenge to others, Harry replied: “10/10 no.

“All I can say is eating 11,000 calories in a day definitely doesn’t make you feel like a champion.”