Tatler’s guide to Manchester Uni is absolutely spot on

They call our after parties ‘infamous’


Teen Tatler have written a guide about our uni and it’s surprisingly accurate.

The guide dubbed Manc as one “for the clubbable type”, but apparently “you need the grades too” . They’re right when they say the students here actually work pretty hard, even if they play it cool most of the time. No one wants to be the mate that has to retake first year.

Subjects

They named Physics as the top subject across uni (big up Brian Cox) with sociology as the dossiest subject of them all. Perhaps the sociology department needs to invest in a celeb to lecture first years too.

Where you want to live

Tatler have it down when it comes to accommodation. It won’t take longer than a few weeks to realise that Fallowfield is the place to be. If you’re on city campus prepare to spend your life trecking to Fallowfield for pres (or “the infamous house afterparties”, as the they points out). It’s true that there’s never a dull moment in OP, although they clearly haven’t done their research as Little Court, which they mention separately, is actually part of Owens park. Also the tower is filled with more wide-eyed wannabes than “rugby lads bombing off the walls” nowadays.

Where to drink

As for “you’ll always bump into someone in the Brewery”… we’re not quite sure what they’re on about. Where even is the Brooklyn Brewery? We definitely haven’t been there. We’d rather go to the Friendship or Squirrels for a quick pint. And you’re probably more likely to go to the Font rather than the Fallow on a date, it’s a few quid cheaper.

Nights out

“Club nights are huge”- Aren’t they at any uni though? To be fair to them, they named Gorilla, Mint Lounge and Lord of the Tings as some of our biggest nights, so they haven’t actually done too badly. They were also spot on when they said Goldteeth is decent until you hit second year and “grow out of it”. They didn’t mention the amazing music scene in Manchester, leaving out some of our biggest nights like WHP and Pangaea.

Top Tip

Tatlers top tip for our uni was that the “dresscode is totally casual”. This might actually come in handy to our incoming aristocrats from Surrey.  Don’t even bother bringing your heels here, there’s no room amongst the wavey garms and adidas trainers.  But boys, please don’t take their advice and “buy yourself a bucket hat”.

BNOCs

As for the bnocs, who are supposedly Sophie Fitzpatrick and Will Simmonds – are they actually big names? We spoke to Will, part-time rugby lad part-time modern historian, about his new found bnoc status.

“I got nominated by a friend and I don’t get how it was chosen. They put down all the wrong information about me anyway though.” Perhaps Tatler haven’t quite nailed it then.

Our lads representing at last year’s varsity. (Will, right. James, left)

Will reckons his mate and captain of rugby team James Carding is much better suited for the job, so we’ll accredit both of them with bnoc status for now. “I thought you’d never ask” saidJames.

Look out for our BNOCs on the pitch at rugby varsity tonight.