Why Edge Hill University is actually the best university in Liverpool

Edge Hill. Such a great university. Such a great campus. Such a great effort trying to explain where it actually is. And no, it’s not in Edge Hill, it’s in Ormskirk, about a half hour’s drive North of Liverpool.

Considering we won Best University of the year in 2014/15 by the Times Higher Education Awards, we don’t get half as much recognition as we deserve. Whenever anyone asks us where we go to university we’re better off just saying Liverpool – it’s better than being faced with a confused look when we desperately say “Ormskirk?” It’s time the people of Liverpool take us seriously and get to know a little about our small, forgotten university.

We have luxury accommodation

Palatine, Chancellors, Chancellors South, Founders and Graduates Court are the best of the best when it comes to Edge Hill’s accommodation. Huge bedrooms, mini-fridges and even our own TV – it doesn’t get much better than that. We may not have sofas, and we may have to share one fridge between 6 people, but we do have the most sought-after luxury for students – en suites. And what the accommodation lacks in sofas, it more than makes up for in windows.

Almost every room and every kitchen has floor to ceiling windows, which is great if you have a nice view and don’t live on the bottom floor, and if you do, get ready to wave goodbye to your privacy and hello to everybody looking in. Those big windows are also a safety hazard for pigeons. Be prepared for birds to come hurtling towards your kitchen leaving a huge imprint on the window for the rest of the year.

Forest Court and Main Halls are pretty much standard university accommodation. If you’re in Main Halls you’ll be living off chicken nuggets and chips from the canteen every night as you’re fortunate enough to be catered. And no worries if you run out of milk, you’re only steps away from McColl’s, the on-site shop, but only if you’re willing to sell your soul in order to be able to afford it.

In Forest Court, a lucky few have the luxury of having an en suite, but you’ll probably be sharing a bathroom with the six other people in your flat. And with the new construction of the swanky new flats right outside, those living in Forest Court will get the luxurious view of Edge Hill’s latest en suite, top-notch accommodation while sitting in their average kitchen eating pot noodles and cereal.

Back Halls is aptly named, hidden at the back of university where it won’t be found unless you’re lost or visiting your favourite postman. Some say it resembles a prison from the 1960s, but the joke is on them. Those living in back halls are paying half as much per week for accommodation than everyone else, meaning more jägerbombs all round. And if you’re living in Back Halls you’re fortunate enough to be right behind the Student Union, so doing laundry is a breeze. Instead of having to drag your weeks’ worth of dirty washing halfway across campus it’s just a short walk to the launderette. You even have the comfort of going home to wait for your clothes to dry rather than having to sit in the bar for 2 hours or taking 6 treks across campus. The catch? It’s old, dingy and everybody’s last choice.

Alpine

If you’re wanting a night out in Ormskirk, Alpine is the place to go. And that’s because it literally is the only place to go (unless you count the Loft, but has anyone actually ever been there?) Free entry until 11pm means the night starts young, and with £1.50 singles and £3 doubles on student night it’ll be one of the cheapest nights out you’ll experience.

The tiny dancefloor is filled to the brim with students, with everyone fighting to get onto the podium and feeling like royalty looking down on the peasants when you finally manage to squeeze onto it. And honestly, you’ve never felt heat like it until you’ve stood in the middle of Alpine’s dancefloor so it’s no wonder the smoking area is always overflowing too – even on the coldest nights – with sweaty students trying to cool down.

Beware of the stairs – spilled drinks and steep steps are a recipe for disaster and it’s an all too common sight to see some unfortunate soul sliding down the stairs after a trip to the toilet. Whether you’re wearing heels or trainers, the stairs take no prisoners.

If you’ve survived this far you’ll be waiting all night for the DJ to play some bangers, and when he finally does at 1am you’ve got an hour to party until they kick you out at 2am. Don’t bother with the £3 taxi home, there’s nothing quite like staggering back to campus, which is an excellent opportunity to sober up before getting home and sticking some chicken nuggets in the oven.

Campus

Edge Hill has the best campus of any university, ever. Grass everywhere, trees galore, two lakes and even our own beach (which is constantly empty, despite unis attempts to host BBQs and beach parties).

We have an abundance of adorable wildlife – constantly seeing ducks, geese and rabbits wandering around campus is enough to brighten anyone’s day. However, if you touch any of the ducks you’ll be fined for misconduct, and heaven forbid you jump in the lake – you may as well leave university now.

There’s always that one weird rumour going around that a cleaner found a live duck in someone’s microwave one morning, but who knows how reliable this is. Our campus cat is a common sight, and follows around every student it comes into contact with begging for treats and tickles and it even became a resident of the library one night, sat proudly in the foyer like it owned the place.

The Postman

If you thought things couldn’t get any better, the best thing about Edge Hill is our postman. The friendliest, yet sassiest, man you could ever meet, who greets everyone by name and never fails to make you smile. He complimented my scarf once, and it was the best day of my life. The air of mystery that surrounds him is what makes him so much more interesting, what is his name? Where is he from? Can he be my best friend?

We have had enough of being ignored and unheard of – we may be small but we are mighty.

Edge Hill may be the forgotten university of Liverpool, but we definitely have more ducks than you.