Every girl you’ll meet in the Level toilets

They may be predictable, but they’re still all 10/10


As much as we can lie to ourselves, everyone has a soft spot for Level. What’s not to love? A different type of music on each floor, ending the night on level three dancing to some Sugar Babes with a VK in hand? Classic.

But what’s a trip to Level without making a quick pit stop in the toilets to take a quick selfie or freshen up after waiting too long in the queue outside in the rain? Next thing you know you’re bonding with your new best friend over being an independent woman who doesn’t need no man.

The poser

Try going into the bathroom of a club without finding a group of girls taking a selfie in the mirror. You can’t. It’s the best lighting in the whole of the club, and there seems to be a no judge policy of girls taking a photo of themselves in a bathroom. And if you’re really lucky, you might even be invited to join the picture with this group of strangers, and there’s no way you’re saying no to that.

The crier

There always seems to be one girl in the bathroom crying over a boy she likes or an ex she still isn’t over. Been there, done that. But it’s ok, there is always one girl who is basically Mary Poppins and her bag is full of make up and products to make you look like you never shed a tear, we’ve got you girl.

The dramatic drunk

Enter the girl that has had one too many vodka cokes and is stumbling to the to the cubicle questioning whether it’s time to chunder. With her arms flapping everywhere like a bird of prey, and legs buckling beneath her like Bambi, no doubt her no-less-sober friend will be running as quickly as she can behind her ready to hold her hair back.

The sober one

There is always one that was ready to go home two hours ago. All effects of alcohol consumption have worn off, and she has to try and make sense of what her drunk friends are babbling to her. You can see in her eyes whilst she is stood in the corner of the toilets waiting for her friends to get their act together, that all she can dream of is chicken nuggets and bed. I feel you sister.

The argumentative one

You’re just trying to fix your hair in peace, next thing you know a tornado approaches you ranting and raving about how much another girl has pissed her off. You don’t know what to say so you just agree with everything and nod with a smile. Occasionally touch her arm and tell her she is so much better than anyone else. You’ve avoided drama and jobs a good’un.

The friendly one

She smiles at you from across the room. It’s like some friendship love story and you know for the next five minutes she is going to be your best ever friend. She walks up to you as if you’ve known each other for 10 years, you introduce yourself and give each other a hug. You exchange brief life stories, she tells you how amazing it was to meet you, gives you her snapchat and leaves. Off she goes into the abyss of boots & Beyoncé. Shame you’ll never see her again. It was fun whilst it lasted.

The one who lost her mates
It’s inevitable at one point in your clubbing life you’ll misplace your friends when they say they’re going to the toilet and for you to stay where you are. Somehow the bathroom ends up being the first place a girl goes. Chances are her mates aren’t actually in there and she frantically tries calling them, only to find she has no signal. Good luck love.

Trying to find the gals like

The one who you know from home
You walk into the toilets and you recognise the face of the girl stood to the right of you. You know she’s from home but you’ve never actually had a conversation lasting more than five words. She tries to make awkward conversation about mutual friends you have at home before you have nothing more to say to each other and she awkwardly turns around. Please pee faster friends.

The complimenter
What is it with alcohol that makes girls so bloody lovely? You look like you’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards after the sweat of floor two, and there is one girl who can’t stop telling you how fit you look. Whether it’s the Scouse charm or the alcohol talking, we like it.

In conclusion, you’re ever feeling a bit lonely or low on self esteem, go to the bathroom of a club. Unless you’ve just thrown up your guts, you are bound to walk out feeling 10x better about yourself, with a few new gal pals and cute pics for the memory book.