What your choice of Leeds club night says about you

One of Leeds’ strong points has always been its nightlife. The saying “there’s something for everyone” really rings true here: whether you’re into doing ket in a grimy toilet cubicle or dressing like you’re stuck in 1994, you’ll be able to find the right club night for you.

Pryzm (Quids In)

Half of the night will be dedicated to taking about five hundred selfies featuring your immaculate eyeshadow and perfectly blended contour. You’re the type of girl who will go “omg take another one!” after every single photo, before struggling to decide on one to post the next day.

You’ll end up making a collage, slapping a VSCOcam filter on it, and posting it with the caption ‘LN’ and a cocktail emoji. You’re the type to become bezzies with randomers in the Pryzm toilets, bonding over a shared love of the same makeup brand or because you’re both wearing the same shade of MAC  lipstick – probably Velvet Teddy.

Your feet start to ache at around 1am because you felt compelled to wear heels – although you’re not quite sure why, as Pryzm isn’t exactly the hallmark of quality. But it’s all okay – you’ve managed to get smashed and it’s only cost you a fiver.

 Hifi (Mixtape Project)

Let people know you’re edgy af by donning a scrunchie and swinging half your hair into a topknot. This is also a good way to show off your hoop earrings, again the sign of a truly artistic individual. You’ll tell everyone your wardrobe is ‘vintage’ or ‘thrifted’ or ‘from this market in Camden’, too embarrassed to reveal half of it is stuff you stole from your mum, the other half stuff you copped for under a fiver on Depop.

Not so edgy.

Equally uncool is your middle-class upbringing: you’re probably a teensy bit of a champagne socialist. That said, you likely have amazing music taste, and nobody ever regrets giving you the AUX. If you’re at pres, it’s likely your Spotify playlist entitled “wavey tunes” will end up blaring at some point.

Attic (Propaganda)

With £3 guest list, it’d be rude not to hit up Propaganda on a Saturday. You’re a bit of a closet indie kid; the retro-themed nights and eclectic DJ sets have always attracted you, but you’re not indie to the point of pretentiousness, hence your safe outfit choice of “jeans and a nice top”.

You and your mates will be found at 4am on the dancefloor, still jamming away to that pop-punk track you loved when you were thirteen, generally having a great time and not taking life too seriously. You’re pretty chill at the best of times, but with the allure of £1.50 singles, you really don’t care what anyone else thinks as you start singing Mr. Brightside at the top of your lungs.

Canal Mills

What better way to let the world know you drop MD than by smearing glitter on your face, donning some wavey garms, and heading down to Canal Mills. Or should I say Canal Pills?

Other things to do to let everyone know you do ket: wear some sort of patterned top – the uglier the better – and tell people how you picked it up in a Thai market stall on your ‘gap yah’; make sure you listen to the worst kind of techno imaginable; and use choice words like ‘skatty’, ‘dank’, ‘gassed’.

Why not appropriate some culture while you’re at it and wear a bindi? Get a snap with it on and make sure to Instagram it the next day with the caption ‘namaste’ and some sparkle emojis.

Warehouse (Sticky Feet)

You’re a bit of a party animal, let’s be honest. You go out purely for the fun of it, hence your cute but dressed-down look. You’ve opted for flats – sensible, as you’ll likely be dancing ‘til the break of dawn. Honestly, did you even come to Leeds to get a degree?

Your snapchat story is just a constant stream of flashing lights and thumping bass. Have you ever even stepped foot in the Conference Auditorium? Actually, we all already know the answer to that one is a resounding no. But who cares – you’re fun to hang out with, and you’re our go-to if we’re looking for something to do at the weekend, because you hit up Sticky Feet every Friday with all the dedication of an evangelist hitting church on a Sunday.