Everything that has or will ever happen during a night at Arena

It’s that time of the week again – or the third time that week for those of us who are hardcore Arena veterans. You find yourself walking down Summerland Street towards the bright club lights, hoping in anticipation that the night brings something new and unexpected.

But it’s Arena. Despite its attempt at themed weeknights, you can guarantee that your night will always be the same as the last.

1.  There’s a queue – and as you walk shamelessly to the back of the queue you ask yourself why you didn’t buy a ticket.

   Staying optimistic in the Arena queue

2.  Most queue talk consists of older years telling freshers about the good old days when it was Arena – not Unit 1.
3. For those organised enough to have bought the 10.30pm entry ticket, you can smugly walk past those queuing as you enter the club.
4. Then you realise, there is no one inside at 10.30pm and wish it was still those Arena days when stamps were still a thing.
5. For those still in the queue, it gets to that stage when you start to doubt whether £5 entry is worth it.
6. Of course it is, you’re in, it’s 1am, and having the last hour and a half to enjoy all the wonders Arena has to offer definitely justifies paying £5 entry right?
7. As you enter there is always someone getting dragged out for being too paralytic – something you vow will never happen to you.
8. First stop – the coatroom queue – which always happens to be just as long as the queue outside.
9. Next stop – girls make a group visit to the bathroom to discuss the antics from the last Arena visit.

   Girls hit the bathroom for that important selfie

10. Meanwhile, the guys head straight to the bar,
11. Finally everyone is at the bar,
12. You order yourself three VKs, of course.

    Loving those VK deals

13. When the barman asks you what colour, the response is always that look which says “Do I look sober enough to care?”
14. With an hour till closing you finally make it to the dance floor.
15. Despite the same playlist being played every week, the girls still scream in utter amazement when Whitney Houston’s “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” plays on a Tuesday. 
16. The guys secretly love it too.
17. After a few more drinks, it’s time to head to the smoking area where conversations take place that most of us don’t remember the next day.

    Smoking area banter

18. Once you head back inside you some how realise you have lost all of the friends you came with,
19. It’s time for that famous loop of arena as you desperately seek out your friends.
20. You spot some people that you met once at a house party a while ago and decide they are good enough to dance with.
21. Across the dance floor you spot your original friends.
22. You say goodbye to your substitute friends.
23. Once reunited you have the great drunken idea of sneaking onto the VIP podium,
24. Once on the podium, you dance right at the edge over looking the dance floor as if you own the place.
25. The DJ announces the last song and you and your friends clutch to each other refusing to leave – well 2:30 is ridiculously early.
26. This results in the bouncer dragging you out – something you earlier vowed would never happen.
27. You stumble onto the pavement and realise you are a lot more drunk than you thought.

    That drunken walk home from Arena

28. There’s only one thing to do now – food.
29. You head to either Sidwell’s Fish and Chips or Mega Kebab, as they are the only legit places to go after a night at Arena.

    Enjoying some of the finest food off Mega Kebab’s menu

30. Cheesy chips are the best option – although you admire anyone who is more adventurous.
31. As you stagger home, you contemplate whether you should try somewhere different like Cavern or Mosaic.

But you can’t help but love the repetitive and predictable nights at Arena. So much so that you spend the walk home planning your next visit.