What is Exeter’s most luxurious hall?

It’s not Rowancroft


It has been said, occasionally, that Exeter is a University attended by the privileged few. And what better way for our Home Counties honeys to spend their parents’ money than on ostentatious accommodation.

Housing costs are our largest financial demand, behind tuition fees. Exeter University itself estimates costs of £180 a week for 32 weeks in its official budgeting guide. The total comes to £5760 for the academic year. A few thousand more pounds for that room with a view is a drop in the ocean.

Complete with inspirational statue

ROWANCROFT (Self Catered)

Cost Per Week: £131.88

Hours you’d need to work (£6.50/hour): 20

Cost Per Year: £5538.96

A year in Rowancroft is equivalent to entry for you and seven friends to Monday Arena, Wednesday and Friday TP and the occasional Thursday Moz every week, for 42 weeks.

Where are all the people

DURYARD (Self Catered)

Cost Per Week: £137.34

Hours you’d need to work (£6.50/hour): 21

Cost Per Year: £5493.60

For a week in Duryard you can buy 13 70cl bottles of Sainsbury’s Basics Vodka. That’s 520 bottles, or 364 litres of vodka, for the same price as 40 weeks in the most remote accommodation on campus. You could party like the Red Army in 1945, or walk all that way. Every day.

It’s new and shiny

LAFROWDA (Self Catered)

Cost Per Week: £139.02

Hours you’d need to work (£6.50/hour): 21

Cost Per Year: £5560.80

Instead of living in an en-suite Lafrowda room for a year, you could partake in the Lemmy’s 3 for 5 VK deal 1,112 times. That’s 3,336 VKs. If you’ve been keeping up with current affairs, that is the same number as was rumoured to have been consumed by BNOC of the year winner Tom Parsons on the night of his graduation.

Lovely period architecture

EXETER HALLS (Catered)

Cost Per Week: £164.43

Hours you’d need to work (£6.50/hour): 25

Cost Per Year: £5261.76

If the food isn’t to your taste, for the price of the weekly rent, you could buy 16 medium margarita Domino’s pizzas. Obviously you’d use the vouchers and get 32 pizzas each week. You fat bastard.

The view from the smoking area

BIRKS GRANGE VILLAGE (Catered)

Cost Per Week: £208.88

Hours you’d need to work (£6.50/hour): 32

Cost Per Year: £6684.16

32 weeks in a Birks Catered en-suite could buy you a new Macbook Pro every two months, and you’d still have enough money left over for an iPhone 6+. How very Exetah.

Obviously, the sun always shines at Holland… Out of the residents’ arses

HOLLAND HALL (Catered)

Cost Per Week: £224.98

Hours you’d need to work (£6.50/hour): 35

Cost Per Year: £7199.36

Holland Hall’s residents could buy 91 regular lattes at Costa each week, for the price of an ensuite room with a view in the most expensive halls on campus. That works out as 2,938 a year. Or a fully functioning caffeine addiction. And as such, qualifies as Exeter’s most rah residence.