Dude, Where’s My Trophy?

By , Senior Tab reporter on

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The Water Polo Trophy was flaunted worldwide by Oxford, who KIDNAPPED it after losing the Varsity game.

The Cambridge University Water Polo squad have been training hard since their Varsity victory last year. They’ve trained non-stop to hold on to the trophy they deservedly earned

Or at least they would be trying to hold on to the trophy if it hadn’t been nicked. We can exclusively reveal that, in a bout of Mahal fever, an opportunistic bunch from the Oxford squad made away with the trophy.

Ungracious losers perhaps, but as the team made their way back on the X5 – trophy stowed safely in their luggage – they hatched a plan to show the trophy a good time.

Here are a few shots from the trophy’s globe-trotting travels:

 Taking a break on the beach after a hard season

Making a brief appearance in India

Getting out of Oxford to swot up at a real university

Hopping onto a topless tour back in Oxford

OUWPC: Wanted for trophy theft

Making friends in the capital

Rounding off a gap year’s worth of travelling with a hard-earned drink

Hamish Crichton, a member of that winning Cambridge team from last year, told The Tab: “They’ve set a dangerous precedent. Whilst it is an honour to have a trophy with such a travelling pedigree, hopefully on this gap yah style experience it will have matured and grown up in a way the Oxford team have not.”

Opportunistic? Vengeful? Perhaps, but at the very least they can’t be accused of being ignorant of cult French films from the noughties. This clip from Amélie reveals where the inspiration may have come from.


‘Le prank’

With the Varsity match just days away the episode is sure to spike the rivalry between the two sides. As for the trophy, who knows where it’ll be off to next year…

The Swimming and Water Polo Varsity Matches will be held on Saturday 18th February at Iffley Road, Oxford.

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  • TPJ

    I'd go ape-shit if they did this with the U21s trophy

    • No you wouldn't…

      …because you'd be too busy training.

    • JPT

      But I'll be the one with the trophy next year !
      Got to dash, Oxford U21s are calling.

  • Weetotal

    That's a pretty rubbish trophy for a Varsity fixture

    • because

      its not a proper sport…

      • Impartial

        Toughest sport aside from alpine skiing apparently…

        • cambridge dropped it

          it's also only half of it

  • Ladvan

    Well, half this article is good. The other, not so much #metropolis

  • Oxford Dictionary


  • Jamie Crawford


  • Fonetix

    Oxfud ar robin, theevin, gud faur nuffin tow rags

  • boring&isolationist

    “We posted it back to Cambridge with a number of holiday snaps inside. We had no response from the Cambridge team until a news article appeared in their student paper last week, a typical example of their boring and isolationist nature."

  • JLR

    What a dickhead.

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