The advantages of being ginger


Gingers have a tough time, but it's not all that bad

Ranga, Ginger-pubes, Ginger-minger, Carrot, Rhiangutan (a personal fave), tampon-head…the list of insults that I have been subjected to over the years is never-ending.

Life’s always been a struggle for the ginger people and there’s even the odd case of serious abuse today. Still, things have got a little better since the 15th century when I would have been burnt at the stake for being a witch or hunted down for my pale skin, which was believed to be a trait of the vampire.

Sometimes it feels as though the witch hunt is far from over, but instead of trying to disguise my fiery head in a shade of blonde or brunette, I deal with my Ginger ‘disease’ by embracing it. You can beat the bullies if you stay ginger and proud.

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Gingers are still tormented, but it’s not as bad as it used to be.

I don’t have to bleach my upper lip

I may not have glossy, perfect tumbling brunette locks but at least I don’t have a ‘tache.

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Nice ‘tache

We’re a rare breed

The gingers are dying out. It’s true. Only four per cent of the world’s population are redheaded and I am proud to be part of this exclusive group. In the near future my people will probably become extinct, so if you think about it I am as legendary as the DoDo or a dinosaur.

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Keep kicking us and we’ll die out

My friends can always spot me from afar 

My glowing white skin and my bright hair make me impossible to miss- I am instantly recognisable. There’s no awkwardness with the person waving at you in the distance, it is definitely me.

The health benefits

Amongst other insults thrown my way, I’ve also acquired the name ‘Shade-Gremlin’ because I tend to avoid the sun. I don’t tan, because I can’t. I have to wear factor 50+ even in England, but I don’t care because I have a smaller chance of getting skin cancer. Every cloud…

What I had to take away with me last summer

What I had to take away with me last summer

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It’s a hard life

Gingers Unite

Ginger people do actually unite together. If I walk past a fellow ginger, I either think to myself “that person is also ginger”, or I give them a nod in ginger solidarity. We acknowledge one another with silent approval and understanding.

We’re harder to knock out

It has been scientifically proven gingers need more anaesthetic than blondes or brunettes. In an article on the BBC, Doctor Edwin Liem said: “Since red hair can be traced to particular mutations in the melanocortin one receptor, we now have the opportunity to evaluate central nervous system pathways that may influence or mediate anaesthetic requirement.”

Aside from suggesting all ginger people are mutants, this means we are super strong. So don’t mess, yeah?

Gingers need 20% more anaesthetic, apparently.

Gingers need 20 per cent more anaesthetic, apparently. Put ’em up

The guys on Tinder bloody love it

There’s always going to be someone out there who “has a thing for redheads”. Whether this attention is wanted or not is another matter, but it’s still flattering nonetheless. Unless your name is Casper…

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Hmm…soz Casper

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Bit rude but I’ll take it

Playing dress up is easy

Don’t have a fancy dress costume? No biggie. Just grab a stripy tie, make a cape out of a bin liner and you’re a Weasley. If you’re feeling really creative you can fashion a wand out of a stick. (See below).

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Fake tan is NOT your friend

You might be tempted to turn to fake tan after years of torment over your pasty complexion, but the sooner you accept your ghostly white appearance the easier your life will become. Unless you want this to happen:

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It actually looks painful

We rarely get spots

If nothing else convinces you, gingers usually have a flawless complexion with not a zit in sight.

Might look like a ghost but it's better than the zit on your face

Might look like a ghost but it’s better than your zits

Ginger role models

Florence Welch, Ginger Spice, the Weasleys, Ann Robinson, Lindsay Lohan (think of the Parent Trap and the Mean Girls days), Lily Cole, Axl Rose, David Bowie, Prince Harry. The list goes on. Like them or not, they’re all more influential and more powerful than you.

I mean, would you wanna mess with the Celtic warrior Queen Boudicca? I think not.

My overall message to my fellow gingers is to hang on in there and embrace your ginger genes. To all the non-gingers out there, stop asking me what colour my pubic hair is.

@rhianlubin
  • Devil’s Advocate

    …but your pubic hair’s ginger, right?

    • Rhian Lubin

      no, it’s purple

      • Matt Taylor

        I can confirm that Rhian Lubin has ginger pubes

        • Rhian Lubin

          hahahahaa

  • Margot

    I love your article :) (from a proud ginger girl!)

  • Anonymous

    My role model is Cintia Dicker, she’s amazing! :)

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  • Emma

    This just made my day, well done girl!

  • Barry

    The revolution could be televised, it will certainly be pale skinned, freckled and coming to a city near you soon. http://www.gingerwithattitude.com :)

  • Purpleshade

    I’m not quite sure what all the recent fuss is about. I’ve been ginger for 63 years and I’ve not been teased over it, neither has my daughter as far as I know. Mostly I find people (especially men) are very admiring of my ginger locks so much so that I colour it even brighter now that I have some white showing, (yes gingers tend to go white not grey). I do have to be careful of the sun…very careful as I live in one of the sunniest inhabited places in the world that is, Western Australia. OTHER ADVANTAGES… Very little and very fair arm and leg hair, clear skin that needs little attention and is not prone to acne, people remember me

  • Micky Stirrups

    as a fellow ginger kudos for the article. I wouldn’t mind the (frequent) jokes I get if any of them were any good. I have only heard one good ginger joke and it was one my dad told me (a fellow ginger). He said tell that joke to people and they’ll see that calling you carrot top ain’t having no effect whatsoever on you. It is really offensive tho so I won’t put it on here! To any adolescent male reading this article – don’t give up hope. Whilst some women like tall men, or well built men, or rich men, I have found that there is a population of women in the country that love a bit of ginger. Stay strong, brothers!

  • Emma

    I think it means we’re more likely to get skin cancer

    • Katie

      If you avoid the sun and stay in the shade, no it doesn’t!

      • Tom Jones

        Then it’s just rickets and osteomalacia to contend with instead…

  • Lee

    We aren’t going extinct. The percentage of gingers hasn’t changed significantly since ancient Rome..

  • Anonymous

    You are hot. I would.

  • Anonymous

    This article is fab, makes me laugh everytime, so so true!!

  • Ol

    I am ginger and I hate myself for it. Several times I’ve tried to end it all. I just don’t want to live like this. Tonight I’m going to finish it I just can’t face another day

  • Andres Rodriguez Guapacha

    I do have a thing for ginger girls. Shame they don’t seem interested in Latin guys T_T

  • Mr. Tinder

    Don’t where this dislike for redheads comes from, they’re freakin hot

  • No Soul, No Worries

    Ginger and proud 😀

  • Joel

    Gingers actually have more of a risk of getting cancer.

  • Not Projecting

    Unfortunate that I’m a ginger guy with shit skin, then

  • KB

    Axl Rose being a role model however…

  • Brock

    I never knew being ginger gave you ginger teeth as well – until I saw the first photo.

  • Will Godwin

    Sun cream blocks vitamin D production in your skin which is know to help prevent cancer, therefore using factor 50 sun cream makes you more likely to get cancer
    http://scholar.google.co.uk/scholar?q=sunscreen+vitamin+d+journal&hl=en&as_sdt=0&as_vis=1&oi=scholart&sa=X&ei=Tz2QU4qCLaev7AbsjoDwAw&ved=0CCQQgQMwAA

  • Lord Hardtrasher

    So… does the carpet match the curtains?

  • Nick Johnson

    Yeah. I’d fuck her.

  • ging

    we’re not dying out, that’s a myth, check your facts ffs

  • DavidA

    Imagine replacing your pride in your hair colour into the pride of your skin colour. And then it is totally wrong. Double standards!

  • Bojangles

    Had a few nicknames but my favourite has always been ‘Tequila Sunset’, quite a charming name if I don’t say so myself

  • Silja Ey W.

    The “ginger gene” is not dying out. It’s a mutation in your genes, and will be transferred to your children and your childrens children. and yes you can only get a ginger baby if both the parents carries the mutation in their genes – but just because you don’t get ginger children doesn’t mean the mutation dies of, or disappears. There can go generations before the next ginger in your family gets born .. Technically for the “gingers extinction” to happen all with the mutation would either have to die or stop having sex.

    The mutation is a recessive gene, and recessives genes can’t just disappear, though, it can become very rare as the ginger gene is!

    http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/jul/10/redheads-die-out-extinction-ginger-gene-bad-science-red-hair

    http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/genetic/redhead-extinction.htm

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/tomphillips/gingergeddon-is-cancelled#.kxo8NRxMKr

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