Don’t let politics ruin your Christmas

The Christmas period promises a lot of things: mine pies, presents, and a lovely little food baby after you’ve eaten not only three courses, but your entire selection box too. You’ll happily watch the soaps just because it is Christmas (you don’t watch them any other time of the year, nope, not you) and you’ll cringe through the Christmas special of Mrs Brown’s Boys. But with all this eating, drinking, and indulging in cultural pastimes, comes the unavoidable conversations that arise when families get together.

From Brexit, to Trump, to our very own Arlene Foster and her beloved pellets, the political landscape of the year has created a lot of room for debate. You probably have opinions on these important matters, and it is inevitable that they’ll come up at the dinner table in some shape or form. Here is a guide on how to discuss these matters in a generally friendly way, and how to avoid full scale arguments breaking out in between passing the gravy.

Assess the situation

If your drama senses start to tingle, step back for a moment and think. Who is the person you’re debating with? If it’s someone you live with, you have a bit more leeway with how far you can go. They are probably used to having political conversations with you at home and are already aware of your beliefs. This does give you the power to push their buttons, but you should be sensible enough to avoid certain topics that you know will cause friction and subsequently ruin Christmas for everyone. If you do end up in a heated discussion, don’t worry – there will be little need for damage control as they’ll be quicker to forgive you since they live with you.

However, if it is an extended family member who you don’t see as often, or have some pre-existing issues with, it gets tricky. You don’t want to have a full blown argument with this uncle or cousin, so you need to be wary of what you’re saying and how it is being received. Watch their facial expressions and body language to give you an indication on how your criticism of the DUP is being taken. It is absolutely possible to voice your differing opinions on political matters during a family occasion, but just be wise about it: it helps to know when to agree to disagree.

Don’t be a wee shit-stirrer

Prepare yourself with the facts

It can be tempting to rush into a discussion guns blazing, shouting ‘BREXIT MEANS BREXIT,’ or yelling ‘BREXIT IS GOING TO RUIN MY LIFE HOW CAN I INTERRAIL IN EUROPE.’ Whichever side you’re on, you should approach the subject from a place of respect for the opposite side. The best way to do this is to arm yourself with the facts: research how much funding we get from the EU, but equally look up immigration numbers.

It would be useful if the information you have is legitimate and not just a regurgitation of a subtitle from an article you scrolled past on Facebook. The fake news scandal that has erupted post Trump indicated that a lot of people fell victim to click-bait stories, especially on the right, that fueled narrow-minded views and opinions, and reported literally false events. If your family is basing their opinions on these lies, it can difficult to have a rational discussion as you may feel like the conversation is going nowhere. Realistically, it is pretty hard to change someone’s opinion through one talk; people like to make their mind up for themselves. But if you at least introduce them to some ideas that contrast with their own, they may eventually come round to your side – just don’t expect it to be all fine and dandy by dessert time.

Evil Kermit is sure to make an appearance this Christmas

Try to keep it friendly

This is a lot easier said than done. Politics can evoke such deeply personal responses, and this year it seemed to do so even more. The tumultuous political landscape of 2016 has left a seemingly unhealed divide between the younger generation and our parents/grandparents. Most young people view the Brexit vote as a vote against all that they stand for; a forced departure from our European brothers and sisters, and a middle finger to globalisation. On the other hand, older people are finding themselves having to adapt to an increasingly changing society, causing them to feel left out in this new world. Both sides become defensive and this is where political conversations become a lot more heated than need be. If this happens, back off and allow some cooling time between courses.

It is likely that over the Christmas period you’ll encounter family members that have completely differing political beliefs, so it is important that when discussing such things that you challenge their views with a degree of class and respect. Let’s say your relative is displaying some painfully racist views about immigrants. As terrible as their views are, you don’t want to embarrass them, you and the rest of your family who are awkwardly asking each other what they got for Christmas for the FIFTH time. Refrain from the practice of “calling out” your relative by labelling them a racist. Instead, tell them that their views are racist – this subtle change in wording becomes less accusatory as you’re attempting to separate their politics from their personal self.

Brexit? Excuse me I have to pee

Of course, you may come across a morally repugnant member of your family who you may never wish to see again after hearing them mouth off about Muslims, immigrants and everything else in between. In this case, it is perfectly acceptable to call them out as, even though it is important to treat your opponents with dignity and respect, social etiquette can only tolerate so much.

Let’s not allow political differences cause familial disharmony this Christmas – there will probably be enough family drama without your tangents on the EU anyway. While you must certainly speak out against blatantly bigoted views, at the end of the day, sometimes a simple agree to disagree is needed to keep the day festive.