John Bercow is honestly such a petty little bitch and I am here for it

So despite over a million people signing a petition to halt Trump’s state visit to the UK, happened-by-accident Prime Minister Theresa May isn’t intervening with his impending holiday – speaker John Bercow though, he is.

John Bercow, potentially the most over the top speaker the House of Commons has ever seen, has said that yeah, Trump can come to the UK if he wants, but he categorically will not be allowed to address Parliament. Essentially what Bercow has done here has said “look, I can’t stop you inviting this cunt to the house party, but he will not be going anywhere near my room”.

Saying the chance to speak to Parliament was not “an automatic right” but “an earned honour”, Bercow’s full snub is as follows: “Before the imposition of the migrant ban I would myself have been strongly opposed to an address by President Trump in Westminster Hall. After the imposition of the migrant ban by President Trump I am even more strongly opposed to an address by President Trump in Westminster Hall.

“We value our relationship with the United States. If a state visit takes place, that is way beyond and above the pay grade of the Speaker. However, as far as this place is concerned I feel very strongly that our opposition to racism and to sexism and our support for equality before the law and an independent judiciary are hugely important considerations in the House of Commons.

“I would not wish to issue an invitation to President Trump to speak in the Royal Gallery.”

His pettiness reached across the party lines, as even Labour veteran Dennis Skinner said: “Further to that point of order: two words: well done.” The Commons erupted into spontaneous applause. Essentially, people were here for it.

The Speaker isn’t really supposed to be involved in all this stuff, but obviously John Bercow does not give a fuck. It’s not even the first time he’s used his position as speaker to court some drama either. Look at this video, he loves it.

Here’s another video of him telling off Bernard Jenkins for being late while not giving a single fuck.

I’m not saying John Bercow is a great politician. I wouldn’t be the first person to point out that despite his ballsy speech against Trump, his political record is patchy at best (a Tory is a Tory is a Tory and all that). But let’s focus on, instead of that, how absolutely extra he is as Speaker. Did you know, for instance, that right after he got the position he ordered a flamboyant renovation of his apartment. He bought a new TV and DVD player. He spent £20,000 of Parliament’s cash on it. I’m not saying it was moral, but I am saying it’s funny.

If Bercow’s Trump speech shows anything it’s that, despite whatever else is wrong with our politics right now, the Speaker is a petty little bitch and we love him for it.

@rosielanners